Good morning,
I need some advice, I'm seeing my mam every day part from Sunday's, today I really don't want to go in to see her, I'm so tired and drained,
My mam clock watches for me if I'm not on time she cries, cries when I'm there, cries when I go. She had her hair cut yesterday as she's been going on about it for ages. That was a carry on but it's done, she's so panicky, I spoke to palliative care nurse she's going to speak to nursing home see if they can get sedation upped, just to calm her a bit more, she says she just wants to go, I totally understand that she has no quality of life no more, she's constantly got diarrhoea, she gets tablets for that.
I'm just so tired, I don't know what to do anymore. some advice would be great
Thanks
Xxxxx
HI Magpie26
I'm going to be frank - you need a bit of space to recharge your own batteries here. It's ok to not feel up to going to see her today. And assuming you didn't go today (I see this was posted a good few hours ago) it's also ok to not go tomorrow and if you still feel drained, its Ok not to go on Monday either. You sound as though you need a break.
Supporting someone through this journey is tough on so many levels - emotionally, mentally and physically. It's totally and utterly draining so don't be too hard on yourself here. I've lost count of the number of times I've typed that "it's ok to take some "me time" - it's not selfish. It's essential to make sure you are in the best place to support" her.
By the end of G's journey, I was utterly exhausted on all levels and I'm not ashamed to admit it.
Take this journey one day at a time. It's ok to have a down day too. We all have them.
Sending you love and light and strength and hugs
Wee Me xx
Macmillan Support Line - 0808 808 00 00, 7 days a week between 8am-8pm
Hello wee me,
Yes I went in, she was very tranquil she ask if I could get her some nuts so I did, think she's give up on the diarrhea now 
she was saying you had your hair done, I says I bloody wish. I wondering if her eyes are going a bit funny, poor soul, you think the end is near then she was like this today, she starting to struggle with her opposite side now her left hand quite shaky. Asking what I was doing this afternoon, she has never ask she was being weird if you get what I mean. I'm taking it as a bonus. Then she was just sitting looking at me for ages
Bless her man, like you said you don't what's going through there little heads, it is getting harder, she knows I'm not in tomorrow. It's was just a weird vibe today in a good way if you know what I mean
Thank you
Xxxxxx
