My husband has stage 3 bowel cancer

Hi Helen, I'm really sorry for the news.

I got diagnosed with stage 3 bowel cancer in early January (after similar symptoms) and I'm half way through a 5 week course of radiotherapy with chemotherapy.

By far the first few weeks are the hardest, and not that it's sunshine and rainbows for me now but once I had a clear plan it makes things a lot clearer and I'm in a much better place mentally than I was at the start. It's the unknowns and what ifs that are inevitable cause of worry - but they do gradually get better.

Hi Helen 

My husband is 46 and we have been told today he has colon cancer but awaiting staging and tests to see if has spread. We have a 17 year old and 13 year old. Like you, my husband has always been the strong one and I feel very scared, but probably nothing in comparison to how he is feeling. We knew something wasn’t right but suspected IBD. He had bleeding and on/off diorhea for a couple of months but it seemed to be reactive to certain foods and stress.  I hope you are ok. It’s a massive shock. Not sure how to cope moving forward. 

Julie 

Hi Helen,

I'm 40 with a 5 year old and I was diagnosed in January following an interview incidental polyp discovery. 

The first period of waiting between scans, update and a plan have been very stressful but the main thing is it's been caught. 

I wish you all well. 

Hi Helen, my husband has stage 3 too and is 51 years old.  We found out last week.  I have a 17 and 15 year old.  I've been looking through the forum for advice and people with similar experiences but hidden thus far but I saw your post and wanted to reach out.  I have no advice at the moment as we are at the beginning of our journey too but maybe just saying 'hi, you're not alone' helps you and me.

Hes our rock. Hes always the one that pays the bills, organises things and tech support for our gaming obsessed children while I am emotional support and admin of the family.  We've always done everything together. An independant unit. Us against the world ...the thought of being dependent on outside support terrifies me. Im on an emotional roller coaster as Im sure you are too.  Ive been given some lovely advice from my friend (also stage 3 and 80% into her chemo for breast cancer).  She said 'Stay positive, support him to stay positive, lean on your friends and family when nessasary and dont forget to take time for self care'  Hope this helps and please do reach out if you want to rant :)

Good Morning HelenW123,

If you click on my name you will see an account of my own experiences from diagnosis to the restoration of a 'new normal' life. Be patient and do not panic: worrying about things you cannot control is quite pointless.

Best Wishes 

Dulac

Thank you all for your messages. Sorry I haven’t replied. I really would like to stay in contact but it’s been a really difficult few days. 

i didn’t think i would ever say this but Richard’s cancer has had to be put to one side for now. After going to hospital last weekend and finding out that he had pneumonia, they discharged him. Sadly we ended up back in hospital on Thursday where he still remains, he has a partial collapsed lung. I don’t understand how from the end of January everything seemed fine and now we are at this stage and it’s not even the cancer.

Im desperate for him to be well so he can start his chemo.