In a blurry place

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Here I am at 4am unable to sleep. Mind working over time once again. 

I've been having bsxk pain for quite some time and more recently, Ive been experiencing chronic pain in my shoulder. I thought it was a shoulder injury and after a few days of the pain, once I started vomiting because of it, I found myself in A&E getting checked out. 

They found a lesion in the proximal humerus. An MRI on Monday of this week, follow up with consultant following day, immediate CT scan completed and referral to the local cancer centre.

The MDT where I was referred to met on Friday and called me asking to go straight in that day. Met with consultant who said they were very concerned at the imaging. I'm having a biopsy under GA on Wednesday next week before he is able to make the diagnosis. I have similar pain in my clavicle as well as a mass and also in my spine. 

I'm trying to prepare myself for all eventualities. I have no emotion right now. I've three young children and I am concerned for this. I don't know what to expect or how to feel. Chondrosarcoma is the cancer the consultant said it may well be.

Such a blurry place right now.

  • Dear Melissa, my heart goes out to you sweetheart. Insomnia is hell when your mind is racing and full of pain and fear. I hope & pray that your treatment and recovery proceed smoothly without any complications. You will find lots of love and support on here. Thinking of you and sending big hugs xxx

  • Thank you Penny36. It's been a rough couple of weeks but I will have a clearer picture on Friday when I meet with the consultant following my biopsy a couple of days back. Xx