Hello
My dad was diagnosed with terminal bladder cancer last autumn. It’s spread to his lungs. He had five cycles of chemotherapy which he found unpleasant but bounced back from reasonably well. He’s had a catheter in since diagnosis
He then recently had three sessions of radiotherapy and has been suffering from unpleasant stomach symptoms for the last week or so. He’s lost lots of weight and also isn’t drinking nearly enough because he gets leakage from his catheter and gets pain with it, so he’s dehydrated as well. He’s not taking the recommended tablets for his stomach or for pain relief, and now is refusing to go to hospital to get his catheter changed even though it is partially blocked. He had a horrible experience with a previous change and is no doubt worried about the stomach issue and infinity of wait in a&e.
My mum is the one there taking care of him and is super stressed and worried about his condition and the fact he’s not doing what the medical professionals are recommending, as well as feeling abandoned by the system. I’m stressed because I’m not there to help and because I thought we would have time to spend together as a family over the summer and now I’m worried this is it and he’s just going to fade away in horribly degrading circumstances. I really don’t know what to do. My dad is very stubborn and just not the sort of person who it’s easy to persuade (he has an unrelated brain injury from the years ago which increased his stubbornness) and I don’t want my last times with him to involve me badgering him.
