Bladder Cancer spread

Hi all, it’s been a long while since I’ve last posted here, I’m looking for any advice on experience or knowledge on any cases similar to mine if anyone can help?

I’m a 44 y/o male. Diagnosed with advanced BC in November 2021, had TURBT op and then 4 rounds chemotherapy which ended mid May.

Since then I’ve had an MRI, CT and PET scans. Went for consultation with Urologist this morning and I’ve been told that the cancer has spread to Prostate, Lymph Node and also lower Sacrum. I’ve also developed a large lump on my right side, just below my rib cage.

My consultant has said that I’m in a dire situation, surgery may be an option, however he is hesitant to go ahead with surgery as the recovery could severely impact what little time I have left and ultimately prove pointless.

They are holding a multi-disciplinary team meeting on Friday where my case will be discussed and then advise on my options next Monday which feels like forever away.

Can anyone with any experience give me advice on this situation? All I can think of is the fact I was being told that 12 months is now my potential life expectancy, everything else is a blur.