Good Morning All,
Back from my second session of the latest round of intravesical chemotherapy - I think this is the third, possibly fourth, set of treatments since Trevor was first spotted hiding in my bladder, which was six years ago now.
I know that many on here will be very familiar with the treatment, but I thought I may share my experiences, and views.
It should be remembered that I tend not to take life too seriously, after all, no one gets out alive do they? 
My treatment regime is doses of Mitomycin-C instilled into the bladder via a Catheter.
You then have to retain it in there for about an hour, or so, to let it do its work, before letting it out again.
First things first. What is Mitomycin-C? Well, turns out it is (in very simplistic terms) derived from a Bacteria that lives in soil - Streptomyces caespitosus (yes, I Googled it!). .
One does marvel at the thought process that suggested the link between soil bacteria, and treating bladder tumours with it, and I doubt it was 'Hey! What happens if we shove some of that earth into his bladder, to see what happens?', although I am sure stranger things have happened.
What does Mitomycin-C look like? When prepared for instilling into the bladder, it is a most beautiful deep purple colour (Qualifier: I am slightly colour blind, so others with full colour vision may see a different hue) which, whilst being most attractive, also reminds me of the old coloured bottles that contained poisons.
Getting it in the bladder. SImple! It goes in via a very small hosepipe (techy term: Catheter) in your (ermmm) 'Pipe' (non-techy term). This in itself is not particularly pleasant. I am sure there is a minute sub-culture of society, who may have a fetish for this sort of thing, but if they do, the reasons, and what enjoyment they receive from having it done, is totally beyond my comprehension. After that, the squirting (again a non-techy term) of the liquid into the bladder is pretty straightforward, and painless, and it is swiftly followed by the pleasure (if you can call it that, maybe 'relief' would be more apt term) of having the aforementioned 'hosepipe' removed.
Next the fun part, which if you have a mind to, you can turn into a sort of game.... Holding the solution in. I was told it is best to retain the solution on your bladder for at least an hour, and a bit longer if possible. TOP TIP: DO NOT WATCH THE CLOCK WHEN YOU FIRST HAVE THIS TREATMENT!!! If you do, you will likely discover that around 5 minutes after having the instillation, you will find yourself wanting a wee..... Next, you will keep looking at the clock, at approximately 30 second intervals, praying that the hour is up..... The pain/discomfort, which I believe is as much psychological, as actually physical, as you know you should not go, is worse that the insertion of the hosepipe...
Another TOP TIP, at least as far as I am concerned, is to always have a good wee immediately before the treatment. That way you can tell yourself that you have not long been, and you DO NOT need to go yet, which might help - But still DO NOT look at the clock!!
After the first treatment, or two, you will become accustomed to holding it in, and that is when you can play the game of 'how long can I wait', to try and beat your personal best.
I may sound boastful here, but I can actually claim a personal best of Two and a Half Hours!!! To be fair, I fell asleep (had been on nights immediately before the treatment) as soon as I got home, so probably cheating a tad, as did not have the 'clock watching' part.
Coming out: When you finally go, the liquid that comes out is, in my case at least - do not forget I am slightly colour blind, a very strange, verdant green colour, no doubt the result of the mix of the colour of urine & the colour of the mitomycin-c solution. At first view you may find this a tad alarming - I did, wondered what the hell had happened in my bladder, but it is nothing to worry about.
What they do tell you: Whilst you are passing this verdant green liquid, you may experience a slight stinging sensation. This will pass, likely to be replaced by a REALLY annoying itch, that you cannot get to. Reminds me of if you have a plaster cast on, and get an itch inside. Although poking a knitting needle inside to scratch this itch IS NOT recommended! Taking anti-histamines helps, as does drinking lots of fluids, to flush it all through, although I was given a 'frown' when I commented that a few pints of cider help with the flushing, and had it suggested 'water' was a better option.
What they DO NOT tell you: Another side effect of the instillation of the mitomycin-c solution is the small amount of air, that unavoidably gets quirted into the bladder at the end of the liquid phase. As they say, what goes in, must come out. I this case the effect is, how would I describe it as a 'Willie Fart' (pretty sure any Ladies having this treatment might call it something different, but that is not for me to speculate upon). First time this happens you are likely to think 'What the f,......... was that?', but it is painless (for me anyway), and would probably be a very amusing point of conversation, if you have friends who have a similarly childish sense of what is funny.
Well, that is pretty much my experience of Intravesical Chemotherapy. It is not the most pleasant of things to have done to you, but to be honest, as far as chemotherapy goes, if the above is all the side effects you get, then you have to agree that you are getting of lightly. When colleagues at work hear I am having 'chemo' one of the first questions they ask is 'Will you lose all your hair?'. My usual reply is 'not unless I manage to urinate on my head by accident', which usually results in embarrassed laughter from them, or sometimes a look of disgust (that is their problem, not mine).
With that, I will sign off for today, as work beckons...
All take care, do not let the b'stard grind you down, and May your God go with you.
Hi JJ. An interesting and informative read. Good information for those starting on that path. Nice to see you have retained a sense of humour. Best wishes.
