Dilators

Hello Shell,

Ok, I would say (and ignore it all if you feel unsure) don't worry about dilators whilst you are in any pain or discomfort - you just wont be able to use them.

Stick with using vaginal moisturiser, lots of it and just apply generously. Only touch yourself as far as it's comfortable, but if you can gently put the teeny tip if your finger inside your vagina, you'll have made a start. Keep doing very small bits of finger until you feel relaxed and happy about doing it. You might also find a small vibrator helpful, using it to touch inside yourself a little. Just do a few minutes every couple of days and don't worry about making progress quickly.

Once you are able and comfortable using fingers and lots of moisturiser or lube then you can start thinking about the dilators. You can get soft silicon ones if you find the ones you have are a bit hard, but don't rush things. Don't put it off though, or you might develop some scarring which would be unhelpful.

xxx

Like you, I was really sore for a long time. I finished my treatment in December and have just started using them. There’s no rush, you’ll know when you are ready so put it out of your mind until you are

Hello Shell46 

You aren't overthinking it at all and the extreme tenderness that remains at the end of treatment is a constant reminder, I am not surprised that you are worried.

I have severe anal stenosis and dilate daily; I purchased a very cheap set of silicone dilators (about £14) on Amazon that are extremely soft and bendy and I can use the smallest with lots of lube.  It is possible that they would be a lot less intrusive vaginally than the rather terrifying hard plastic ones supplied by the NHS.  And the smallest one really is tiny, about the size of a woman's smallest finger.  These dilators are so soft you would certainly not be able to use them with any force so hopefully would not cause pain.  And Mrs Vanilla's suggestion of using fingers in the early stages is excellent, using your own hand is lot more intuitive than a foreign object.

Just take things very slowly and gently.  Very best of luck, please let us know how you get on.

Irene xx

Hiya, I finished my treatment end Nov and started using dllators about 7 weeks after. It was sore but then got better, now it is a but uncomfortable some days but ok on others and I am just about to move up a size. I bought softer ones from Intimate Rose, much better than the ones issued by the NHS.  Wait til it is a but more comfortable for you but you will get there xx

Hi Shell - just been using mine and always get anxious!  I am 18 months past treatment and struggle emotionally and physically using them as think I should be able to progress to more than the small ones - be patient with yourself is the best advice. I didn’t use them for a few months after treatment but did explore myself with fingers as panicked about smear tests.  Do what suits you and take time out to rest x 

Hi

Try not to put too much pressure on yourself..

I bought a set  of soft dilators..and I also bought a few small vibrators from Ann summer's   

Im a year out of treatment now and whilst it no longer causes pain.  The feeling is not the same..

Try to stay positive.. it does get better.. just remember how much you have got through in the past few months.. stay positive..

Xx