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Hi everyone,

I just want to apologise if I’ve been a little absent over the last few days, this will probably continue over the next couple of weeks too. Unfortunately my dear dad (87 years young) has just received a diagnosis of kidney cancer following being rushed to hospital 3 days ago with what was thought to be a kidney stone but turned out to be an internal bleed from a tumour he didn’t even know was there! He’s still in hospital & is now suffering from chronically low kidney function & although he's stable now this will stop them removing or treating his cancer. We all know the pressure a diagnosis puts on families & we’re trying to deal with this news as best as we can. I’m sure you lovely lot will continue supporting one another & I will pop on as & when I can, I just didn’t want anyone thinking I’d just dropped out or wasn’t bothered anymore. 


  • Dear Nicola,

    We are so sorry to hear your sad news and I am sure I can say on behalf of all the people in this group that you have supported over the years that none of us would have thought you were not “bothered anymore”. Sending you all our warmest wishes. Now it is our turn to support you and your father at this difficult time. 
    With love and best wishes to you all


  • So sorry to hear this news  Nicola, just concentrate on your family for now! You helped so many of us over the years and we'll all be there for you now! Sending you much love and warmish wishes!

    Moira xx

  • Nicola

    I am so very sorry to hear this.  I know that your Dad was a huge support to you during your own diagnosis and treatment and this must be so hard for you all.

    I noticed that you hadn't been on the forum for a few days but never thought for a moment that you weren't bothered, I was concerned that something may have happened.  Thank you for letting us all know your situation, and I am sending love and best wishes to you all.

    Irene xx 

  • Hi  

    I’m sorry to read your news, but be assured that everyone will understand you need to take a step back to concentrate on your family. I hope your dad is comfortable for now, and doing as well as he can be. Soft hugs for you.

    Sarah xx

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  • That should have said warmest wishes Nicola, sorry! xx

  • Dear Nicola

    So sorry to hear your sad news of your dad's diagnosis.  A huge shock for you and your family.  You've always been there for all of us and we will be here thinking of you and your family.  Concentrate on your dad now. 

    Sending love and a virtual hug 

    Carole xxHugging

  • My heart is with you and your family, Nicola. 



  • Hi Nicola, so sorry to hear about your dad. We do notice when you don’t come on here as often as you are a staple  to the group, but you also have life commitments out there too. Getting old is no fun. My dad passed away from prostate cancer over ten years ago which eventually spread  but he did live with the prostate cancer well over twenty years. I still remember how difficult it was with everything so can fully empathise how it is. Take care of yourself.

    Julie x

  • Hi everyone, 

    Just a little update, unfortunately my wonderful dad passed away on Friday morning.

    Whilst he was in hospital he had gone on to receive a metastatic prostate cancer diagnosis, they think he’d lived symptom free with this for possibly 5 years, we are still unsure if the lesion on his kidney was connected to this diagnosis or if it was a separate cancer, he began treatment for the prostate cancer the same day as his diagnosis in the way of hormone therapy & his prostate & mets (bones) responded incredibly quickly & incredibly well, almost immediately, but he began bleeding again from his kidney last weekend & unfortunately nothing more could be done & he was put on end of life care on Wednesday. The difficult part was that he was fully aware up until approximately 7 hrs before he passed so knew they had withdrawn treatment & knew he was dying. During this time my mum has also lost her twin sister so as you can imagine it’s been a lot! Life just isn’t fair sometimes is it? 

    I'm hoping as things settle a bit I’ll be able to be more present on the forum again. 


  • Oh Nicola.

    I am so so sorry you have lost your Dad.  I know what a tower of strength your Dad was to you throughout your cancer treatment and beyond, and when parents are so strong in their old age, you think they are going to go on forever, don't you?  And how sad for him to be aware that treatment had been withdrawn.  He must be a huge loss to your family and to lose your aunt as well - you have really had a terrible time of loss.

    Take all the time you need, you have always had so much time for others, now you need to detach and concentrate on getting through the next couple of weeks (and long after).

    Sending love and deepest condolences

    Irene xx