Oh the lump!

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Good morning friends, yes I feel we are friends as we support each other virtually and I have been sat here with my early morning coffee feeling sorry for myself. I am nearly four weeks post surgery from this lump removed and not going to swear even though I have felt like saying some choice words of how it’s been. I have had the odd day where I think great it’s getting better and much less pain and itch and the next day, BAM! Skin flared up and now found a split which was probably the cause of this unbearable pain. Obsessed with constipation so took husk which resulted me having five or six stools yesterday. The Friday I didn’t eat all day as I didn’t want to have to go to the toilet to give the sore bum some relief. I have been reading and catching up on posts and they help enormously some really good posts and some where others are struggling. I haven’t heard anything from the hospital regarding my operation and if they found anything and hoping no news is good news as I am assuming if they found cancer they would have got back to me by now? I might give them a call which brings some anxiety on my part as I tend to shut things away. Last night the pain was really unpleasant and I did all the deep breathing I went dizzy and I think I was slightly hallucinating dreaming about Djokovic coming to my house after losing the final at Wimbledon and me introducing him to my family and friends. What on earth was that about?  Hope you all have a great start to the week.

  • Jaycee12

    I am so sorry that you are still suffering so much pain four weeks later, you have my sympathy.  When it is a part of your body that you have no choice whether to 'rest' it makes things a hundred times worse.  Splits are really painful, I deviated from my norm yesterday and took another stool softener instead of Laxido and had constipation this morning.  Cue much straining and eventually I did go but passed a fair amount of blood and I am still in bed with a throbbing backside.  And you have had this for almost four weeks.  No wonder you are fed up.

    I hope that after all this you get really good news from the hospital and you can put this behind you.

    Sending hugs

    Irene xx

  • Hello Irene it made me laugh with your last sentence of putting it behind me! X

  • I’m so sorry you’re still not fully healed, AND I’m sorry you haven’t gotten news on the biopsy!  While I’m inclined to agree that if it were urgent or dangerous, they’d have notified you by now, I also think they should tell you SOMETHING!  I mean, don’t they know this “waiting” stuff is really so hard on cancer survivors!?

    Hugs and good energy your way,


    P.S. Wimbledon was pretty fabulous, though ;)

  • I don't pay much attention to tennis, but my husband was watching that match and I surprised myself with my whoops when the young fella prevailed! 

    I think 4 weeks is plenty enough time to be patient. Even if they don't have any info yet, letting you know is pretty important. For sure give them a call.

    I'm trying to imagine anal surgery pain on top of anal cancer treatment and it makes my brain fizz out. I just can't. I'm so sorry you have to go through this. I hope they're at least keeping you stocked with pain killers and skin ointments. 

    Beaming cool blue healing energy at your posterior!



  • Thank you Red, I have called the hospital and left a message. Hopefully I will hear back soon. I don’t know if the doctors strike here will affect things and delay the results even more. I did sit with my feet up all day Sunday and watched tennis!

  • Hi Suz I thank you for your comment. I have not eaten anything today so far to try and give my anus some relief but it’s not ideal is it? I have slowly started to try and gently massage the area to try and prevent scar tissue becoming hard. I was given codiene pain relief but cannot take it due to constipation and pain in stomach. I just take paracetamol and now using Aquaphor which eases the split but doesn’t do much for the itching. At the moment I am doing okay. Fingers crossed tomorrow will be much better

  • Hey Jaycee, I've been thinking about you! How's it going now, a couple of days out?

  • Hello Suz I was just going to put something on here, you read my mind. I had a call from the hospital yesterday and spoke to a nurse who wasn’t the specialist nurse but she was going through the answer phone messages and getting back to the people. I asked if my results were back as it was four weeks now and she said they had not had anything back at all. I told her how frustrating it is for us to wait not knowing if we have cancer and you are kept in limbo. She is going to speak to the specialist nurse to push for a response from histology. She did ask what the anus looked like and do I lo at all! I said I am obsessed with it at the moment using a 10x magnifying mirror and it’s healing with a white rim which feels very hard and a split underneath. I think it’s the split that is causing the pain. I have noticed today although I haven’t had so much pain and occasional mucus tinged with blood! Hoping that is just inflammation. My appointment with my oncologist was not due until 22nd August and this week she is on annual leave. They said they would bring it forward I am seeing her next Thursday and didn’t want to see anyone else as she has very small fingers and if she does have to give me an internal I want to have the least pain possible. I have been watching some YouTube videos by a pelvic Doctor who really gives some good tips regarding opening your bowels without putting pressure on the pelvic floor. The YouTube is called Pelvic Empowerment and she is Australian I think. I wish you well for Friday 

  • Jaycee, I am really sorry you have had to wait so long.  I totally agree, to have this hanging over your head when you already have a medical history just isn't good enough.  A split is extremely painful and I hope it continues to improve.  That's a relief that you are seeing her next Thursday, will be thinking of you and hoping all goes well. 

    I can just see us all in the future to our oncologists 'Show me your hands!'

    Irene xx