People's reactions, post treatment.

Hi Marie (Mecca),

I know exactly what you’re talking about, I think that some friends etc., hear the news that your cancer free & pleased as they are for you that’s kind of sometimes the end of it for them where our journey back to good health continues for a long time after but unless those friends are with you 24/7 they don’t see the healing process we go through. I don’t think that this comes from a bad place but unless you’ve been through a cancer diagnosis & treatment I don’t think you really understand the physical & psychological impact it has on your life long after the treatment is done & even following the ‘all clear’. I can honestly say that this experience has changed me forever, I’m not sure I will ever fully regain trust in my health but I will continue to try & reach that point. It’s made me appreciate the small things a lot more. I’ve never felt the need to explain to anyone unless something in a conversation has lead me to comment, I’m still the same friend I was before any of this just with a few alterations one of which just happens to be a radiated butt  lol  

Nicola 

Yep Nicola once your butt has been radiated it's just a future of being a bad ass. I'm not glad you have experienced the same but I'm glad for me I'm not just feeling over sensitive or hanging out with dodgy family and friends. I usually try to make a joke when I really want to shed a tear and biting my tongue is becoming more difficult by the day. I was talking to my sister the other day, over the moon that I had been able to do tidying and used the vacuum cleaner but next day I was worn out to which she replied scorn fully "just tidying up! And let's be honest, we're never cancer free. Even if we were 100 percent sure we would never get cancer again physically, it will never leave us mentally. Thank you for being here for us Nicola xxx Marie 

Hi Mecca, Congratulations on your all clear!! 

I know exactly what you mean. Unless someone has experienced cancer treatment they have no idea what we go through. After a call to HR, I had to have a stern talk with my Boss after I went back to work part-time 6 weeks after treatment. I had detailed medical restrictions and he wasn't following them. 

Even Friends and some family members don't understand. I finally just did what I could do and stopped trying to explain why I couldn't make it or why I was sleeping in the middle of the day. 

Again so Happy for you and try not to worry what other's think. I am 9yrs NED Praise be to God!! 

God Bless, Theresa

Thank you Theresa. It's all blinking weird isn't it. It's all stress, worry and pain but this may sound strange but I feel like I have gained something I can't quite pinpoint it but I'm hoping it's a super power or my first angel feather xxx Marie 

Hi Mecca, I totally understand this, it’s so true that unless someone has had a diagnosis and cancer treatment themselves they’re never really going to really ‘get’ what we’ve been through. I have a relative who had radiotherapy for breast cancer after a lumpectomy  and that radiotherapy was entirely different to what we have been through, in terms of the side effects. I also find the reactions of people when I’m waiting for scan results frustrating, it’s sort of like, well your last scan was ok so why are you worrying? Again, it’s down to a lack of understanding. fortunately we can understand on here! Bev x

I so understand what you are saying. Reading these comments make you realise you are not alone. At the moment I am quite tearful and saying to myself you have survived the treatment and you can only hope the side effects get better. I don’t think I will ever feel the same after this, physically or mentally but will try and appreciate life as much as possible. I think when the hospital Doctors can give you the NED sign maybe they feel their job is done and now it’s up to us to seek ways to help us to adjust to the side effects. Whilst having my treatment my nurses were of full intentions to help ease the symptoms but I felt it was a massive task to get help without having to wait hours at the hospital to see the doctor. The booklets given to you which could fill a shelf give promises that simply aren’t there due to possibly time and staffing. I come on this site hoping people who go through this treatment come out with hardly any life changing consequences which seem far and few between. I have yet to find out if I am free of the cancer but if I am I think I will always be worried about it returning and what I would do? I know just what you are feeling and it’s pretty sad isn’t it.