I am 64 and have had endometrial cancer for 5.5 years, and the past 2.5 years have been on immunotherapy. I have 2 small lung mets which have been behaving until the past few weeks where I have been having I think nerve pain as they are growing? This has coincided with my 6 monthly CT scan of which I'll get my results in 2 weeks. I am assuming the worst of course! Doesn't help I used to be an Oncology Sister.
My life has been difficult since diagnosis as most of my friends including my best friend have turned their back on me. My husband is wonderful as is Basil our dog!
My 2 brothers really get on my tits to how l they never ask me how I am. All I get is their holiday pics from all over the world via WhatsApp; pics of grandchildren; how wonderful their children are....I could go on. I couldn't have my own children but inherited a stepson who in turn has 2 daughters. He is just like my brothers and never asks how I am! Its always about him and his life etc.
So.... I recognise I am more anxious than normal due to scanxiety...
But I am meeting my brothers and their wives on Sunday for the first time since February for a catch up midway to where we all live
I will be told you look well, one brother always says you sound chipper...ffs. The other brother forgot to send me a birthday message 3 weeks ago as did the sister in laws so they have already pissed me off. One sister in law would you believe is a trained psychologist, the other a teacher. Haven't heard from them since April when I WhatsApped my last CT results. No flowers or card to say well done and no contact since.
I am angry at how little they all care so do I put on a smile and say I'm fine as I always do, or do I spoil the catch up and say I worried as I think my lung mets are active again, and say my results will confirm in 2 weeks.
Thanks for listening. Feel better already!
Hello Cathy (Cathy B )
I am pleased you feel better now that's out - here's my two 'penneth for what it's worth:
A post that says something many of us have experienced but not put in writing - "Cancer Ghosting". I've had it myself, not with family (I am an only child) but my wife and 4 children/partners and grand children have been amazing. It's been friends from those who just drifted away to the couple who announced "they don't do cancer". (I pity them if one gets a diagnosis in the future!).
The only people who truly "get ii" are those of us have a diagnosis - we understand and have a bond together and it's strange but true - you understand the feelings others have and can chat freely with them whatever their cancer!
As to Sunday - it's a very personal choice. I have Prostate Cancer and would probably turn out in one of my Prostate awareness T-shirts, with either "Men - Get Tested" or "Not all cancers are pink" with a big blue ribbon. However for you, I think dress appropriately for the occasion and take a "thoughtful gift" for each family member such as a chain with a heart on it with the message "A family is like a tree - the branches grow in different directions - yet the root remains one". (try Amazon - they are there!!). That should give them something to think about!
Your cancer - it's a "need to know basis" - sod 'em unless they ask - if they want to know they will ask. Life is precious and there's far more to life than pandering to folk who are too much up their own backside to realise things are going on "outside their world".
The above is of course my very personal opinion and nothing to do with me being a volunteer here on the Community 
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I wish you well with your results in 2 weeks time - and I do know what it's like living with a nurse Mrs Millibob is retired RGN/RMN - and of course is never wrong!! 
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Kind regards - Brian.
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