Waiting Chemotherapy to start, finally got a date, since I have been diagnosed though I have suddenly stopped being a person and become a diagnosis, treated like an imbecile by my partner, Told how to behave, what to say, what to do, I feel like going outside and screaming my head off just to stop myself from planting a vase over his head. I feel guilty for bringing this into our lives but angry because I feel like I have lost the life I had. I have TNBC and am 60 nobody to blame, not genetic, just plain bad luck. Funnily enough although I have read through treatment plan my mind refuses to take it on board, just want to get on with it and get on with my life again. I feel lonely, isolated but worst of all STUPID.
Hi Drycider, many of us probably felt like you at the start of the what appears to be a new life after a Cancer diagnosis and many of what you describe happens. Mainly I think it’s a feeling of helplessness as we are or feel we are out of control of what is happening both to us and those around us, the feeling you are getting that everyone is telling you things that you know but actually in some ways it is also their way of trying to help and care for you.
If you really want somebody to talk with independent to clinicians and family MacMillan also have a Buddy Service where you get 12 sessions of support whether telephone or home visits and it’s a chance to hopefully get your mind of all that or talk about it, nearly all the volunteers have had or experienced Cancer in their lives so know quite a lot of how you feel, this link is to the Buddy pages
Give it a go you may find it will help
Hope all goes well when the treatment starts
Take Care
Tony
We will move mountains to help people with cancer live life as fully as they can.
We'll do whatever it takes. For information, support or just someone to talk to,
call 0808 808 00 00 or visit www.macmillan.org.uk
Onwards and Upwards
Laryngectomy and OC survivor
Lead Volunteer for Hampshire MacMillan Buddy Service
