Overwhelmed and I feel like I need more time

Hi Erin

I am sorry to read this about your granny.

Firstly YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE!!!

Obviously this is a heartbreaking situation!

Is there no-one at uni you can talk to? I don't know if they have counselors (used to be pastoral care i think) or something so that you can discuss your concerns? Maybe they can suggest something to help you and take the pressure off a bit. It can't hurt to ask. I'm sure your granny is proud of you graduation or no graduation.

Hi Erin

First and foremost, I couldn't agree more with SamJas - you are certainly not a failure. You are dealing with shock, grief and study pressure all at the same time, so cut yourself some slack.

She's right - approach your tutors or Student Services etc to let them know what's happened. It's important that you communicate the pressure you're under.

Also, I know how hard it is to concentrate when you're dealing with so much emotionally. All I can say from my own experience (my Mum has terminal cancer and I'm self-employed so I really have to combine caring duties with working) is that - once I actually restarted doing my work projects – I found it hugely helpful to immerse myself in something else for a while, even if it was only for an hour at a time. You may find it's the same with your dissertation - especially if it's a subject you feel passionate about. But do give yourself 'permission' to be upset.

As SamJas says, your granny will be so proud of you regardless. Maybe the uni could give you some kind of evidence of the grades you're received so far/progress you've made so that you could share with her in the meantime? 

My heart goes out to you.

Yeah, thank you. The uni have been very useful and say that they could make a special circumstance scenario for me.

meaning I could focus solely on finishing my dissertation and since I have enough evidence that I will pass my exams, postpone them until autumn but still let me graduate so my granny could see me. Which sounds possible.

its just so hard to find the happiness in anything anymore, I love my dissertation topic but I just don’t care anymore. I just feel so isolated and alone in feeling this way

Hi Erin

That's such good news about the uni being flexible with you - at least you know you have options now. Keep posting on here when you need to offload - there are many people experiencing the same shock and grief that you're going through so you really aren't alone.

I know exactly what you mean about not finding the happiness in things any more - I find it so hard to concentrate on the activities I used to love like music and cinema. Even some of my closest friends don't seem to understand why I'm not the same as before. It's like my whole little world has imploded.

Be kind to yourself - some days will feel slightly better than others and that may give you chance to return to your uni work. Stay strong. 

Hi Erin, I’m really sorry to hear about your granny. I’m very close with my nan, she’s like my best friend too, and she’s recently been diagnosed with terminal brain cancer and is having end of life care. I live a few hours away from my family, so I completely understand how hard it can be when someone you love so dearly is going through something like this and you’re so far away and feeling alone.

It’s been a couple of years since I was at uni, but I remember how hard it is to focus on completing assignments while struggling with such emotional distress. I agree with the other people who have replied to you, your granny will be so proud of you no matter what, but I completely understand how you’re feeling. Be kind to yourself, and try and seek as much support as you can from the people around you at uni. Sending hugs xx