Hi all,
Looking for advice because I'm not sure where to ask...
I am an only daughter to 2 unfortunately unwell parents, Dad has been living with cancer for a few years now with various treatment etc, he most recently has had radiotherapy for a brain lesion which was going ok but now he seems to be getting worse, he has had a recent scan to see what's happening and waiting results.
A few weeks ago my mum was diagnosed with breast cancer and has been undergoing intense chemotherapy and is really not coping. She has been looking after my dad but now is struggling with it.
I live 3-4 hours away depending on the day and have 2 very young children...
I'm genuinely not sure what I can / should be doing to help, we don't live there and I don't have the finances to get a place nearby to provide ongoing help and with my children we couldn't stay with them.
Can anyone help to know what my options are with getting them some help??
Hi Amy2024
Sorry to hear about both your parents especially when they have been more self supporting.
If your parents are anything like mine they wanted me to focus on their grandson rather than them but of course that does leave open the question of who. Adult social care falls to their local authority and they are entitled to a needs assessment as can be seen here.
With my parents a first step was them moving to a supported housing project, they had their own flat but there were call bells in every room and someone on duty 24/7. Later my dad got worse and needed the support of a care home - it was not an easy call but it meant he had the support he needed and we could visit without being exhausted from trying to do all the care.
How are you otherwise? I know how these issues can seem very overwhelming. I ended up doing a living with less stress course that really helped me and it can help to look at your feelings when someone has cancer as I found recognizing the emotion and accepting them can help.
<<hugs>>
Steve
