Hello all,
I’m just writing on here because I’m struggling with not being able to talk to anyone that really understands what this cancer rollercoaster is like.
My dad was diagnosed with Kidney Cancer about 4 years ago, we were told he would 12 months but against the odds he is amazingly still with us. I had some counselling back then as I was struggling with the news. Since then we have had ups and downs.
Every time he is unwell I get scared whether that will be the time that he doesn’t get better. He was admitted to the hospital at the weekend as he had a fall and was really confused. Turns out he has an infection and high calcium levels which is what had caused the confusion. I honestly thought we were going to lose him at the weekend but he’s much better now the calcium levels and infection are being treated.
Despite him being better, I am just overwhelmed with emotions. I think it’s all feeling very real and I’m so scared to watch him deteriorate. He is on the last line of cancer meds which the doctor said could give him 6 months if they work but we are waiting on scan results.
I am a young teacher and just couldn’t face going into work today and put on a brave face because I just keep crying all the time (luckily they are really understanding).
I’m sending everyone all the love in the world.
Thank you x
Hello Daughter17
I am so sorry to hear that your Dad has kidney cancer and it must be really hard to cope with all the emotions. I understand how hard it must be each time he becomes ill and you are wondering if this is it. There are so many uncertainties with cancer and this can make us feel helpless at times.
I hope that you are all getting plenty of support from your Dad's team and that you do not have to wait too long for the scan results to come back. I hope the results can bring about a treatment plan that will give Dad some more time and make him comfortable.
It is no wonder that at times you feel unable to go into work. Teaching can be a challenging job and at times it can feel hard to carry on and put on a brave face. It is natural to feel tearful and I wonder if a bit of time off work may help. It is good that work are being supportive and I wonder if you have any occupational health or counselling available to you? You mention you have had some counselling in the past and I hope that it was helpful.
Please do pick up the phone and give the Support Line a call. They really will understand how you are feeling at the moment. They will also be able to look into whether there is any support available to you and your family in your local area.
If there is anything else you need, then please do ask. Please also feel free to post on here as much as it helps- sometimes just writing it all down can be helpful.
Jane
