Visiting

Hi , I am not in the same situation as you but if I was I would ask my partner what they want.  Does your husband want all these visitors, if not then it's not rude at all to say no.  If your husband does want visitors then I would limit visiting days and hours to whatever you feel will work best for your husband and also for you to be able to get some quality time with him as well. You can allow  one visit a week or one a fortnight, whatever you feel is right for you both.

Hope this helps and I'm really sorry for what you are both going through x

Hello Toni, 

Sorry to hear what you are going through. Having lost my father to a terminal cancer earlier this year I understand how the illness and medication can be so terribly draining for them. 

I can only tell you that we told dad to say no where he felt something would be too much and we talked about what he did and didnt want to do so we could help him manage peoples expectations. 

On a side not have you had much interaction with Hospice UK , they can really help in home adjustments and care facilities to make sure your husbands energy isnt wasted anywhere it shouldnt be. 

I wish you and you family all the best and please do get in touch if we can support in anyway. 

Lucie - Juicestool 

Thank you Lucie, sorry about your Dad, sending love and good wishes. 
T

Hi Toni T,

My husband is also terminally ill and sleeps a lot during the day as well as night. He only likes to see visitors for a very short period of time - say half an hour - and is wiped out after that. If  your husband is asleep, I would really let him sleep, he needs rest from it all.

You are not being rude saying that he is not up to visitors, but maybe he can ring them for a short chat, but only if he is up to it. Everyone just has to understand that it has to be patient led when it comes to visitors, when someone is so ill.

Take care and wishing you well,

LLamalover xx

Hi LLamalover

thank you for your reply and so sorry your husband is also terminally ill. I’ve now had a proper chat with my husband regarding visitors and we are going to limit the duration so he can save some energy for us. 
take care of yourself too.