Dad's Diagnosis

Hi 

I’m so sorry for what you are going through, it is so horribly unfair. 

Dealing with this news is so so difficult, and from my own experience of loosing my Dad after a terminal diagnosis all I can say is talk, cry, laugh and live in the now. As much as you can. 

But also use the resources available, there are so many available to help you through this very difficult time. If I can help in anyway please reach out. 

Thanks Juice! I've spent the last couple of days feeling just totally confused. The day of/day after I was devastated, upset that he's not going to be around. But I'm now trying, and totally failing, to justify my feelings. I've tried to say to myself that everyone has to die of something and I suppose it is marginally better to know when than to just get a phone call after a car accident or something. But it also now feels like this massive countdown timer. Like every day I'm at work is a day I could be sat in the sun with him enjoying a cup of tea. Then my brain leaps to 'think of all the beautiful days he's not going to get'. His dad is still alive and turns 100 this year and has smoked for most of his life so some of it is also the unfairness that he's still here but my dad has to go. Not that I would wish death upon anyone. I think it's the total unfairness. I remember all the travel plans he'd chatted about doing with mum now he's fully retired and that won't happen.

I just feel like 3-6 months is no time at all. 3 months is the end of summer. He could be gone by the end of summer and that's unfair and I just don't know what to do.

Hi I completely understand what your saying and feeling, and anything you’re feeling is valid and important you must know that! 

Looking back on my own experience i can now see the positives, as when we found out about dads terminal diagnosis (my 30th birthday), although horrid, dad let us all have a moment but then asked us all to focus on the now! And we did, and I’m so very happy we did. 

So if I can say anything it’s that, try to live today and worry about tomorrow when it comes. 

If you need any support though just say! And in my experience this forum is a great place to start. 

Good luck x