Hi.I am a bit lost for words on how to actually tell my daughter that daddy is going to go to heaven.I am a very outspoken woman but words fail me right now.I work in end of life that often means with people who have cancer amongst other things.I know what happens when someones dying.Its what i do.However i cant bear to think of the grief and sadness my baby will face in the coming days/months/years/forever.Noone wants their child to hurt.My anxiety is through the roof right now.Her dad and i have been seperated for 7 years or longer but we still are amicable when it comes to our daughter.She sees him weekly, works out about 1/3rd of a year in all.She adores her dad.She knows dads got a bad back thats about it.His biopsy results came back last friday its just confirmed what we all knew to be honest.Hes aged 47 shes 9 years old hes got kidney cancer thats spread.Thanks for reading
Hi
So sorry to read about your issues both for your daughter and yourself. Sorry too that it has taken so long to reply, I do not normally visit this group as while my wife's cancer in incurable she is currently stable.
We do have quite a lot of guidance on talking to children and teenagers about cancer here. I know we would all like to protect our children from these sorts of issues but of course that is totally out of our control. When my wife was diagnosed I really struggled especially as our son has autism but we got totally fantastic support with him from his school where we spoke and agreed how we could handle this together. It really helped that his teachers were in the loop because he would ask questions there too.
You might like to consider too what support you need, we quite often see doctors and nurses here who seem to face an extra challenge when their work essentially decides to come home with them. It might be helpful to look at Looking after someone with cancer from the view of a family member and the support that is available to you. I have had some fantastic help from Macmillan and Maggies and bizarrely I absolutely recognize the techniques they are using but someone cannot use them on myself. The old saying of a trouble shared can really be shown to be a very powerful tool.
<<hugs>>
Steve
