DAGNABBIT!!!

Hi Whisperer, and a very warm welcome to our little forum, though I'm so sorry you find yourself here my friend. and I know your no stranger to cancer, but hearing your no longer curable can be very difficult to come to terms with, but the vast majority of us do, in our own individual way, as what's the alternative my friend, very few of us on here share a diagnosis,  but understand our prognosis and how to live with it. So please feel free to talk about anything you want to, as nobody on here will ever judge anyone, and we talk about everything from dying to flowers and everything in-between, we're here to support each other like only we can, and irf you want to scream, need a shoulder to cry on, shour, laugh, or just natter then please do. I'm 4+ years from diagnosis, through all effective treatments, and now on end of life, BUT still enjoying life, all be it a new life, and not the one anyone wanted, as I'm sure you understand, but life goes on my friend, and I'm sure these wonderful people on here can help you, like they've helped so many before.

Eddie 

Hi Whisperer 

I am sorry you have joined us on the incurables train. It’s a friendly place. Try not to focus on the timescales they have given you. They don’t know how you will respond, it’s very individual. I chose not to ask for a prognosis but there are plenty on here who have outlived their prognosis. An oncologist once said to me your job is to stay alive for now because there are always drugs in trial that might be right for you in the future. I have a friend in real life who has lived a couple of decades with stage 4 breast cancer and is on her 17th line of treatment. So book those tickets for Bon Jovi and keep on enjoying life. 

Thanks Eddie

Thanks Coddfish

• Hi Eddie long time no chat. Well we are both still here !. Got scan results on Tuesday, STILL CLEAR YAY on 4 monthly scans now. How are you doing ?
• Hi whisperer sorry to jumping your replies. Well it's such a shock to be told incurable. 2019 I was told that. 12 to 18 months Didn't take long to relies I couldn 't run away from it. I was on immunotherapy for 4 1/2 years and it is doing its job. We have HOPE and what the doctor can do for us. It's your life and uour choice what you do  with the time you have left. I like to travel a bit and enjoy my family eat out. Keep sharing  on site, you'll get support from people who know what the trip your on, ups and downs  and find out how they manage. Take care, thinking of you. X
• Moi

Hello Eddie and Coddfish,

Thank you both for replying.

I think I was being a bit maudlin' when I wrote that. Getting through the feeling sorry for myself stage now. I guess thats a stage on the road to getting on with it. Starting the treatment on 2nd June so we'll see. A bit worried because the first time was fierce, I suppose they were trying to kill a cancer so went for it guns blazing. Missed a bit though. Still, no worries.

If the idea is quality of life I hope this treatment will be a bit gentler, no way of telling till you get into it I suppose. Sorry to hear you're out of treatment options Eddie but both of your stories are really encouraging for me, and I do genuinely feel a lot better about the whole thing because of your replies. Thank you for taking the time. I love the "hang in there till they find a cure" way of thinking Coddfish.

I might not be immortal anymore but I can still be 'Hard to Kill'.

We are keeping the Bon Jovi thing open for now. I suppose we can maybe find a bit of flexibility in the treatment plan to fit that in. 2 week cycles.

I worry a bit about the folk around me. How are they coping with this news? Are they OK? Is there anything I can do to help them? My next generations are in Canada so we are working to get them here so I can give them a hug and play minecraft with the little one.

Anyway, we're not dead yet.

Love to you both.

CraigO

Superb Moi!

See, more encouragement and hope for me. Thanks for taking time out and don't worry about jumping in, kind of fun.

Love

CraigO

Hi CraigO where are uou. I'm in Liverpool.  We all get down days, I'd stay in bed cry read my poor husband would bring me food and coffee. At about 2 or 3 I say get up uou lazy B, shower clean pj's on and go back to bed , or go on the sofa eat treats watch awful films. Don't  fight it, I tried to keep going (not rest) but it would wipe me out for a few days. If you cluck a person's mome or picture you'll get there story. X

Moi

Hi Moi, Its great to hear from you Lovely, also that your scan results are fab, and your still doing well, is wonderful news my friend, as your journey has been a beacon of hope for so many on here, me included, so please keep sharing it sweetheart and popping in. I'm doing ok, getting older hon, but trying to cram in as much as I can, one of the little ones had a nasty fall yesterday, banged her shoulder and head hard, and needed emergency surgery, thankfully everything went well, but as there were signs of swelling she's been put in a coma till tomorrow morning.

love Eddie and family xx

Hi Craig, never apologise for your feelings my friend, their understandable, we all have them, but I see you know the way forward and realise there'll be bumps in the road, and times to let your feelings out, hey I cry often, and just do it, no matter where I am. I welcome them as I know I'll feel so much better for it, I'd go as far to say, it's vital for my mental health. 

Coddfish is absolutely right regarding new treatments, being a nurse and in healthcare palliative care for 15 years, till I retired 5 years ago, the number and quality of new treatments is amazing and if anything speeding up.

I can't answer your chemotherapy question, I do know dose and timing of cycles do vary as do possible supportive meds, I've the possibility of chemotherapy, but with a 30% chance of some benefit, and side effects to consider, on top of needing a pacemaker 1st, " surgery is a big stumbling block for me," it's no promising, but getting back to your concerns about family, I promised mine I would, if possible give it a chance, and my friend, in the last 19 months, the kids mum and our eldest daughter have both had cancer with a poor prognosis, both were given around 1 year, but finding the right oncologist, and improvements in treatments, they are both NED, and Craig you asked how family/friends cope with your condition, all I can say is give me the cancer anytime.

Awww I so hope your family in Canada come home, what a wonderful thing to look forward to, which is something we all need.

It's good to hear your feeling somewhat better today, the weather helps, from a sunny Yorkshire, vest wishes.

Eddie and Sheila xx