Pessimistic and no faith!

100% I was actually treated for arthritis then my first Chemo had a bad reaction. I stated on my new drugs today but I'm just waiting for the sorry we got this wrong again. You get the biggest cream cake and enjoy.

I hope you're feeling OK and haven't had a bad reaction to today's drugs!

Kate

Hi Sweet21pea, I've sent you a message on PMs

Good morning. Surprisingly chemo went well hoorah. Well, was in on time, all went well, picc line not very happy but she still proceeded. In and out really. Had that anxiety thing again. I can't seem to get to grips with it. It's clearly psychological and irrational. It never happens any other time. Thank goodness it doesn't stop me. I will have to find time and effort to go through that stuff to look for some techniques to try combat it. Rest of the day chilled and felt perfectly fine.

I don't sleep that badly. I believe it is the steroids that have disrupted my sleep pattern. I fall asleep at 9, sleep till 2, fall back to sleep about 5 until 7 ish. Doesn't always go to plan mind. Sometimes I don't get back off to sleep. I don't feel that bad during the day. But again is that because of the steroids? 

Yes, exactly, disability friendly but not. I fail to understand how anybody could not understand how pushing a wheelchair on gravelled uneven ground as difficult. I mean at the moment it may mean I don't need the wheelchair as much but I still need it incase. Never mind we are going to pick another route for this weekend and try that. 

I have a friend visiting today. An ex work colleague. Looking forward to a good catch up and tea and cake. What plans have you and how are you and yours? Any news on the cardio? 

Take care and enjoy your day X

Hi sweetpea, lovely to meet you. I'm sorry you had a bad reaction. I really hope your next round of drugs went better. I have everything crossed for you. I've had many things go wrong too. As if we're not going through enough already huh. You're doing a grand job remember and keep on keeping on. Cream cake!!!! Yes, yes, yes X

Hi Marie

Just want to say have you considered to have a port put in instead of PICC line. The port is much easier to live with. There is no lines dangling about and you can have a bath too. 
Hope you are feeling OK today. I found the two days after steroids stopped are the hardest. I am going for my chemo tomorrow

Stella 

Hi Marie, busy day, good to hear chemo went ok, and quickly, though so sorry those anxiety episodes hit you at treatment, and i think you show amazing strength and character to get through chemo despite the suffering it causes you, It must be awful, but thankfully your free of it away from chemo.

If you try the breathing exercises, they work for most and are the easiest to pick up, relaxation takes time to learn, but is my go to. try it online at www.maggies.org Andrew the guy at Leeds is a psychologist.

Steroids can be saint or sinner Marie, but I do recognise your sleeping patterns, there very similar to mine, only I go to bed around 11pm, up between {2.30+4am), awake usually (30-90 mins), and often another sleep of (1-2 hours), with the occasional no sleep, or good night, and hardly ever sleep during the day.

There are a few helpful sites for people who use a wheelchair, www.accessable.co.uk www.scope.org.uk and access-great-days-out.co.uk. I've been trying to think of somewhere, local, in the countryside, you could be comfortable in a chair for a hour, and I can't, sad.

Well Marie, you never talk much about your work or friends, but have a good natter, with yummy cake and a cuppa, sound fab.

Aurora today, the metastatic group has finally got a start date, so met the counsellor to talk about it, had lunch with friends and a massage, took J+J to see the little ones, they've never met baby Mandy before, so a wonderful if emotional couple of hours, and had dinner at Sheila's (J+J) are staying there, and made a fab cauliflower soup, home now, making some winter veg soup for the freezer.

Cardio results, i have a new murmur, picked up on the ECG, not sure of the cause so have a CT scan booked for the 30th, an hour after my MRI spine at the same hospital, lovely,

I hope you and your friend put the world to rights and saved Dave, a piece of cake.

love Eddie xx

Good morning. Thank you Eddie and that is exactly what I'm doing. Going through some combat anxiety techniques. Putting it in to practice may be difficult but I'm certainly willing to give it a go. Thanks for the online Maggie relaxation I will take a look at that today. 

I seem to have had a very busy week. Monday chemo,  Tuesday friend came, Wednesday I was out picking up parcels with Dave, click and collect, and yesterday I put the tree and decorations up for grandson arriving. I've had DN visit and PN is coming today. I'm tired. More than usual. The good news is I've slept better but still feel tired. Today after Helen has left I will chill and hobby. Absolutely craving some me time doing nothing. 

I think you know I'm not from Nottingham. Although I had lovely work friends I don't really see them as close friends. Not really got any close friends here. My besties are in Scunthorpe. Where I grew up. We have been besties since I was 13. Unfortunately due to work they don't get over that much but we have contact frequently. 

Thank you for the helpful wheelchair site. That's another thing I will take a look at today. Hopefully I will be able to find an activity for the weekend and hopefully I won't be too tired. 

Well at the moment steroids are a saint. I've dropped down to 10 mg now so we shall see how that goes. And I have a puffy face much to Amy's delight ribbing me about it lol Don't think there's anything I can do about that. 

What a lovely day it sounds like you had. All so wonderful. Although sorry to hear about the new murmur. I hope the scans go okay and everything is alright. Don't envy you having an MRI, they scare me too. 

How are you today and what news have you? Enjoy your day whatever you may be doing X

Good morning Stella. No I hadn't thought of a port. I will take a look and thank you for the useful information. I'm doing okay thank you, had a busy week and don't think I've done myself any favours. Really tired. Will hobby and rest today. I hope you are well as can be and chemo went well? X

Hi Marie

I had the port put in under LA by a trainee nurse (supervised by a consultant). It was relatively straightforward. You can have sedation is wanted. The port is much less maintenance and easier to access and live with. It is more expensive to put in than PICC line so is a case you don’t ask the you don’t get. Just said you need to have bath instead of shower or you want to swim then they can schedule you in.

What are your hobbies? I am struggling with my spare time as was working as a dentist. Now just a patient not a clinician ever again. 

Hope you are resting up well today x