I am currently going through treatment for breast cancer. I got diagnosed in October 2025 and am due to finish treatment around April-May this year but I was wondering if you anyone help me with some advice please.
I was tested to see if the breast cancer I have was genetic and it wasn’t but now I still want to have a double mastectomy regardless whilst also keeping my nipples if possible. I am expecting my surgery to be this May and I want to be sure of this decision because I am terrified of regretting it.
I don’t know if I have what is called “gender dysphoria” but I have felt this way for a couple of years because I am somebody who wears binders (compression vests) a lot as somebody who identifies as non binary and I know wearing binders isn't ideal for long term as they get extremely uncomfortable and unhealthy. I was told the surgery would be possible and I feel having it will really boost my confidence as I have never felt “feminine” or “girly” ever since I was a young teenager.
I do not want children so I know I definitely won’t need my breasts for that.
I also have the worry I will be paranoid about having breasts moving forward once I get the all clear because I’m terrified of the cancer coming back regardless of it being genetic or not.
I don’t know if anyone has experienced this before so I understand if it seems bizarre but I honestly feel like since all of this has happened, I have grown to hate my breasts even more and just want them removed completely now as I feel this would be a literal big pressure off my chest!
Thank you in advance.
Hello TrveTheyThem
My name is Steph, my pronouns are she/her. I’m part of the team who look after the Online Community here at Macmillan. May I wish you another warm welcome to the site, I hope you will find it to be a safe place of comfort and support.
I am sorry to read of your breast cancer diagnosis. I hear that you have some conflicted feelings around your relationship with your breasts and plans to have a double mastectomy. I am here to offer you some support whilst you're waiting for other members to reply.
Please know that in addition to using the Online Community, you can always talk this through with someone at Macmillan. We offer timeless support and a listening ear. The Macmillan Support Line teams are available 7 days a week, 8am-8pm on freephone 0808 808 00 00, email or live webchat.
In case you haven't seen it already, Macmillan has cancer and LGBTQ+ information that might be helpful. Developed in partnership with OUTpatients (formerly called Live Through This) – a cancer support and advocacy charity for the LGBTQ+ community.
Macmillan have partnered with OUTpatients across a number of projects and we'd encourage you to also reach out to them for additional guidance and support. Other resources you might find useful are:
I hope that this helps you find ongoing support and that you will continue using the forums here.
If you have any questions or feedback around using the Online Community or finding the right support from Macmillan, please do let us know. Please do get in touch with us by email at community@macmillan.org.uk or send a private message through the site to Moderator - Macmillan Community
We're here for you for as long as you need us.
Hi, Steph,
Thank you so much for your lovely reply 
I have signed up for a Zoom breast cancer group on OUTpatients and sent a form off to UCATS but I see my surgeon on the 26th January to discuss this to see what they say but I am a bit anxious about what they will say mainly from fear of judgement.
I don't want to overwhelm myself but I may contact the helpline as soon as I've spoken to my surgeon so I have more of a clear idea of what may happen 
That link you sent from Living Beyond Breast Cancer sounds very similar to what I am going through so that's interesting to know, thank you!
Really appreciate your help 
Thought I best post an update here as I never did but I ended up getting a double mastectomy in May this year, not only to lower the risk of the cancer returning but it has been very gender affirming so it's really been a silver lining and I am somewhat relieved my surgeon told me the statistics of it returning was 46% so I didn't have to argue my case! They wouldn't have done it other wise. My surgeon has been amazing throughout my journey so I did him gift art, which he loved!
Now all I gotta do is wait to fully recover because I am a very inpatient cancer patient! I am still swollen, mainly on the right side where the cancer was as they removed some lymph nodes so it's been "messed with" more on that side. The annoying thing is, it almost looks like I have a boob again on that side, which I hate and I feel like the nurses don't understand how much it means to me to be flat.
I was getting seromas, which they managed to drain but couldn't get anymore out this week when I saw them and they said it will just go down on its own eventually and take time as it's still very early days but are very pleased with how I am healing. I have been doing the exercises too. My boyfriend says he can't even see the "bump" but me being the perfectionist I am does because I look at myself every day. My trans friend told me his top surgery took about 6 months to fully "look right" even though his was cosmetic and not for breast cancer.
I also got the all clear from my oncologist but I'm now on my second course of chemo tablets (capecitabine), which are for six months just to be sure. So far so good with the tablets, touch wood.
It's annoying but I'm hoping to go back to work soon because I've been off since my surgery and I don't want to rush into anything and make myself worse.
Not sure if this post will help anyone but I hope it does and appreciate even if people just read it.
Hi TrveTheyThem ,
Thanks so much for giving an update on your journey. It is so lovely to read and I am really pleased you have not only had the all clear from your oncologist but how the surgery has been so gender affirming for you.
I'm sure many people will relate to your story so do keep sharing
Take care,
Emma (she/her)
Online Community Team
