hi susan and amanda, been having problems posting on the other post so thought i would carry on here and see if it works!! how has your weekend been? susan do things feel a little easier for you this year or not really? i feel so sorry for you having all those people around you last year when i bet all you wanted to do was run didnt you? its awful with christmas coming isnt it i even go shopping online as to not have to go shopping with all the xmas things about. i feel so selfish and bitter at the moment and dont want to, i can hear my mum saying come on karen dont be like that but its hard isnt it. i feel so lonely tonight i just want to talk and have a cuddle and a kiss with my mum, sometimes it really hits even harder doesnt it? speak to you both soon, and hope you are bearing up. we all need each other dont we? my love and thoughts are with you love karen xxxxx
I don't know if you'll see this before you go away. I hope you have a good holiday and manage to get through it without falling out. Thank you for all you said to me you do make a lot of sense. I know I should concenstrate on the time I have with mum now and try not to worry about the future but its so hard sometimes. I really don't know how you do it I've not lost mum and I'm falling apart, hopefully I will start to feel a bit better soon. I know I have to keep going for mum and I'm really going to try and do that. I think I worry as we are the closest we have ever been and I don't want to lose her as when she goes that will be my family gone as far as I'm concerned. Anyway you take care and have a really good relaxing break look forward to hearing about it when you come back lots of love Sharon xxxx
I hope you are enjoying your break from school. I hope you don't mind I had a look on the school website. The children look really really happy a credit to you, and what about those teds they are so so cute. Hows the weather where you are its really warm and bright blue sky here in york. I am still feeling really low don't know what to do with myself sometimes but I know I have to keep going for mum which I am trying to do but its so so hard sometimes. I don't have any councelling at the moment I did see someone when mum was first diagnosed again last summer but I only saw her about four times as they only do councelling short term. I think I may need to make an appointment with my gp after easter and see if she can suggest anything. I am like you I take tablets have done for years and at the moment I don't think they are helping I think the dose may need increasing or the tablets changed. I don't work at the moment and haven't worked for a few years although I do want to go back to work at some point but don't know when, my health problems at the momet won't allow me to. I used to work in nursing homes which I really enjoyed but since a woman died in very tragic circumstances I won't go into details as it was pretty horrific needless to say she shouldn't have died she wasn't ill just confused and couldn't look after herself. There was a police investigation and I had to go to her inquest as I was the person who found her after the incident but nothing could be done to save her life. I was diagnosed as suffering from post tramatic stress disorder due to what happened. I was also suffering with depression at the time which was made 10 times worse. The home I was working at was responsible for her death but was never brought to account for it. At her inquest the verdict was open. The police were hoping for a verdict of death by negilence but they couldn't completely prove it. The home was shut down a month after what happened after losing his registation. Anyway thats enough of that i don't want to depress you I hope you enjoy the rest of your break from school take care love Sharon xxxx
Enjoy your break away girls-you all deserve to have a great time. Will hear all about it when you get back. xxxx
Just you and me then, Jayne, aren’t you lucky???? Hope you had a nice meal. What did you have? (nosey me!!)
I didn’t go to the garden after all but I actually went to NEXT instead so Susan will be well chuffed with me. We’ve got parental interviews when we go back so bought some smart trousers and will now have to look for high heeled shoes so that I don’t have to take them up! (Mum used to do all that for me)
I’ve also been looking at some other peoples posts on here and they also have myspace pages so I decided to have a look and got carried away and made my own one but I’ve no friends :-( Would any of you like to be my friend?? Go to myspace.com and search in the friends bit for me (both names) and I think I’m about the last one on the page. I’ll have to rewrite it again as I sound a right boring………. BUT already I’ve had interest from a guy in Bury who likes the Aberdeen accent!!!! It seems to be a very secure site and you can change your privacy settings etc. so if any of you wanted to join in, it would be easy to send emails etc. You only need to join, not do all the stuff I’ve done.
Anyway off for a seat now and hopefully a sleep afterwards!!!
How have you been today, busy I suspect?What you and Louise were saying about your brothers and their second marriages, I wish my brother had married again !!he got married when he was 21 and my sister in law was 18.They went through so many bad patches and he always said when the girls grew up he would leave her.Its only because my Mum and Dad practically kept them financially that they kept their heads above water.They’ve been married now since 1975 !!!! And I still don’t like her, and she doesn’t like me.They get on better now than they ever did.She's not a nice person, she never once visited my Dad when he was dieing in hospital.This really hurt my Mum.she was never particularly bothered about my Mums situation either, not a nice person.Marie, I wish my brother had got himself 2 goldfish instead, now he keeps koi carp, perhaps it’s a substitute for her???My husband has nicknamed her ‘satans sister’, so we call her SS for short.I could tell you things about what she's done since mums been gone all night, but I’ll save that for another time, don’t want to spoil anyones holiday.
I hope you had a good time with your friends, lots to talk about I'm sure.And its right what you said, none of us know each other, but I feel so close to you all.My husband even asks me now when he gets home ‘how's all your mates today are they all ok’.I don’t tell him what we talk about, so don’t worry.Well Marie, if I don’t get back on tomorrow, have a lovely lovely holiday.We’re shopping and bbq hunting etc etc tomorrow, so might not get back before you go.See you when you get back, take care, lots of love jayne xxxxxxxxxxxxx
How are you?The meal was not to its usual standard, I think they must have a new chef.We wont be going there again for a while.I had salmon, which was very nice but you used to get vegetables with it, now you just get a bit of limp lettuce.My husband had duck which is new on the menu, but it was supposed to come with orange sauce, salad and water cress.It came with an orange cut in half, limp lettuce and that was it !!! we were not impressed, so came home early to have cheese and biscuits here.(which I haven’t done yet).
You actually got to NEXT at last, well done.That’s the trouble with most trousers these days, they're made to fit 6ft tall women.When I bought my suit last august I had to go and buy some high heeled shoes as well, which is ok but come summer I will want to be wearing flat sandles, so will probably either have to turn the trousers up or save them till next winter !!!Why is life so hard for women, men don’t have this problem do they??
Louise, you’ve got me intrigued now, I'm going straight to my space to have a look at what its all about.I’ll join if it’s a good site, is it like msn where you can talk and exchange emails instantly.I’ll go and have a look.Anyway if you're not back tonight, I’ll try and get back tomorrow.We have shopping and stuff.And if its nice, which I think it will be, we will be sitting in the garden and having a few drinkypoos, but I’ll charge the computer up and I’ll take it outside to chat, either that or I’ll plug it in the bedroom and trail the chord out the window, I’ll think of something.See you soon, have a good nights sleep.Lots of love jayne xxx
I meant 'cord' not 'chord' above. Do you know I'm getting so bad at spelling since i've not been working. I used to be so particular about spelling mistakes, but i'm getting worse.
Niver mind, purhaps whon i git bak to wurk i well git bak intu the swing of thongs?? ha ha
Louise, ive just registered with my space and i cant send you an email yet, i will try later. it says that you dont do instant messaging either?? do you not want to do this, its a great way of talking one to one instantly. we dont have to wait for the reply to come through.
Your profile is very nice, be careful who you talk to though, you never know whos out there, some right weirdos............. look at me !!!
It's OK, I didn't get back to that guy. The emails don't go right on the page and are left for me to sensor first. Once I've got "friends" I can block everyone out. I haven't got round to instant messaging yet. I have a friend that i sometimes do MSM with but my typing skills leave a lot to be desired and she gets fed up waiting for me. Will have a look tomorrow. I always follow what the girls on the rectal cancer thread are going through and it was their myspace pages that I was looking at. My heart really goes out to all of them. They are going through such a lot at such a young age.
I'm meeting the friend that i couldn't see because of counselling tomorrow. We're parking the car at one end of the beach and walking 2 miles or so to the other, having lunch and then walking back ,so with Benji's walks too I'll be all walked out tomorrow.
See you later
Louise
xx
