hi susan and amanda, been having problems posting on the other post so thought i would carry on here and see if it works!! how has your weekend been? susan do things feel a little easier for you this year or not really? i feel so sorry for you having all those people around you last year when i bet all you wanted to do was run didnt you? its awful with christmas coming isnt it i even go shopping online as to not have to go shopping with all the xmas things about. i feel so selfish and bitter at the moment and dont want to, i can hear my mum saying come on karen dont be like that but its hard isnt it. i feel so lonely tonight i just want to talk and have a cuddle and a kiss with my mum, sometimes it really hits even harder doesnt it? speak to you both soon, and hope you are bearing up. we all need each other dont we? my love and thoughts are with you love karen xxxxx
Morning Louise-- We have a lovely day down here.Clear skies and lovely sunshine.Still a bit chilly,but hopeful it will warm up.Hope you have enjoyed your run.I couldn't even run to the post box at the end of the road!! I am terribly unfit. Poor Benji-- doesn't appreciate the money you invest in him Eh!?? Does the running ease your chest pain,or make it worse?? i do hope that you can get it resolved.
i actually got quite a lot done yesterday which was brill,and has given me a bit of a head start for today.Am just manning the office for hubby whilst he drops eldest off at the course.I was dreading having him working from home,but it has turned out so much better than i could have wished.We had our garage converted so he has his office there,and he can shut himself away from me and the kids when he needs to!!
I should think that after your run,and cleaning your car,you will deserve a nice rest.Hope Jayne will do well in her interview. Actually,we're sure that she will aren't we,it's just wether or not she wants the job,so i hope it does prove to be what she is looking for.If you're reading this Jayne-good luck,but i guess you are rushing about,getting ready.
See you later hopefully Louise.I'm going to get on with lots more housework.I feel in quite a positive frame of mind today.maybe it's the sunshine-i don't know,but i'm not knocking it! It's been a while since i've felt this positive!!!!Enjoy your day,bye for now,love,MarieXXXXXX
Thanks for messages, it is lovely and sunny here to, they just phoned from work to see if I could go in but made some excuse because I have been looking forward to having a day with kids and not rushing about to much! Louise is right ~Marie you are a wonderful support to people, I read some of your other messages to others and though I have posted in past sometimes I find it can take over especially in evening so I have tended to stay on this thread. Yes Im not sure about taking tablets my worry is if you start how do you stop. Quite a few friends have had to take them for various reasons and Im not sure if any have stopped, as it were, yet. Strange about a month and half before my mum passed she saw a show on post natal depression and said to me you just watch out in case you feel like that, I said to her dont be silly mum, there are some people more inclined to depression than others and I wont get depressed - Little did I know - maybe she had some inkling that I would have two things affecting me which might cause depression! I can honestly say though that where Josie is concerned Im not depressed in the slightest, she (and Aaron) help make my day worthwhile and help me get up in the morning but its just the whole feeling oif sadness surrounding this time, a time that should be happy. Josie started walking last week she is so cute and gets so excited when she toddels to you and has to clap her little hands each time. Well Ill sign off for now, going to take these two out for awhile in the lovely sunshine which does make you feel better!
Jayne good luck today I hope it goes well for you, Im sure that you will do brill! Let us know when you get back.
It’s not much of a run, too much to sniff (on Benji’s part, I hasten to add!!) but I’ll take him to the beach or moor later we get a good run there, he loves it. The chest pains just started a few weeks ago and walking does often start them off, although I constantly have a tight feeling. Nothing showed up on the ECG apart from a very fast heart rate. He told me to go back whenever it happened again but he’s on holiday just now and I don’t want to go to anyone else. I’m falling to bits just now-old age I think!!!
I’m off to wash the car now before the haircut at 12:30. I have tried to do it myself but his hair is so thick I can’t manage very well. He makes such a mess in the house with his big hairy feet just now.
I’m glad your hubby’s “office” has worked out well. Does he work from home all the time?
Jayne will be there by now I expect. I’ve butterflies in my tummy thinking about her. Apart from when I left uni I’ve never had an interview and I know I’d get all tongue- tied and make a right mess of it.
Catch up later
Louise
xx
Amanda-just read your post and I agree with what you say about the tablets. I didn’t want to take them but I knew deep down that I had to take all the help I could. I’ve been taking them for well over a year now, although with side effects etc I’m on the third different kind. I hate taking them and hope to stop soon but like you say it does take a while I think to be weaned off them. I still have some awful times but I’m also so scared that if I stop I’ll slip right back again and these times will be even worse. I wish so much that I had a family of my own. I’m sure things would have been so different for me. You enjoy every minute with your kids, Amanda. As you say they are such a good reason to get up and make the most of your life for. What are you up to with them today?
Hi again Louise and Amanda. I think i can understand how you feel Amanda,it's pretty much the same for me.A horrid dull ache that never seems to go away,and some days are better than othere-however,it's constantly there.I like you,will see if i can toddle on without a visit to the doctor, but those who are taking medication should not be down on themselves because of it.They can be addictive,but hopefully it is possible to come off of them when the time is right.i have known people who have taken tablets for years and years, and i suppose that if the body does develop a dependance that can't be shaken off, then it's the price that has to be paid for receiving the help that was needed at the time.I don't think that anyone should beat themselves up if this happens to them.It takes quite a lot of courage to go and get the help in the first place.it's the persons way of saying "i know that i need to feel better than this" and to try and take charge of their life again.We are all different,and we all cope in different ways,and we all need help to do it,just in differing forms.
Hubby has been working from home since last July.The kids love it.He's here when they get home from school and they see a lot more of him than they used to.He's quite sporty,and likes to do activities after work,so before he worked from home i sometimes wouldn't see him for hours on end.Now, because he's here all day,i look forward to him clearing off in the evening and it's just so much better all round!!!!! Its only in the summer months that he's out more-and he's not out every night,but it did used to get me down if he just got up,went to work,came home,and went to bed-which is what used to happen.We talk to each other so much more,and we're a lot closer than we used to be.And, i think that we appreciate each other so much more.He sees what i deal with during a day,and i can see how stressful his work can be and understand that he does need his leisure time.
Hope you,Josie and Aaron are enjoying yourselves Amanda.Don't blame you for not going in on your day off.Its too nice a day to be working!!!!
Hope the doggy haircut goes well Louise.Do you have to leave him there? i assume from your earlier post that you do.Will he look very much different when he comes back? i can imagine him sitting there with the right sulks whilst they trim off all his precious fur!!
Jayne-- please log on and tell us all how it went as soon as you get the time.Love to all,Marie XXXX
Hope everyone is ok today.I just quickly read through the posts and will answer them when I come back on later if poss.Its good to see you back Amanda, I missed you.When I got home my niece turned up with our 2 little munchkins, so I've been messing about with them for over an hour, it was great to see them.Then my niece had to take me round the block in her new car, very nice.I was hoping to go to the cinema with them again, but they're going on Thursday, and I've promised to take my neighbour to hospital because hes having a scan (suspected prostate cancer!), and he was so kind and helpful to Mum, it’s the least I could do for him, so will miss out on cinema.Never mind, there will be other times.
Well the interview seemed to go ok, but I think it’s the shortest one I've ever had.I got there just before 10.30 and was kept waiting till about 20 to 11 (typical doctors surgery!), and I was out by 11.11, so it was all very quick.The money is c**p, but then I guessed it would be because the NHS never pay much do they.But the practice seemed very nice with lots of friendly people.(the only trouble is, all the ‘customers’ that come in are all ill !!).today was supposed to be an informal interview with 2nd ones being done tomorrow I think, with the practice manager.So not sure what they thought of me.One of the ladies who did most the talking said she was concerned that I was ‘over qualified’, ha ha.I was quite taken aback and replied ‘I'm flattered, no one has ever said that before’.They seemed to think I would get bored because of the variation of work I've been used to doing.I wanted to say “no, I can DO bored, I'm used to it”, but thought better of it.didn’t want them to think I was lazy or anything !
Anyway, its such a lovely day here as well today, so I guess you're all off out somewhere.I need to be getting dinner prepared I suppose, so will try and get back later.Speak soon everyone.Love jayne xxx
Sorry I haven't been on here for a while, I have been really down, infact rock bottom.
I am really worried about my dad too, he is also down at the moment and all I can see is complete sadness in his eyes and I don't know what to do. He is still staying with my sister at the moment but everytime he comes down to his own house he gets really upset and starts cyring. Me and my sister don't think he will be able to go back there and live on his own again.
I had a really bad weekend and couldn't stop crying myself, I just feel so low at the moment and sometimes suicidal. The pain is getting worse not better, and I'm scared I'm heading for a breakdown. I think the pain my dad is going through is effecting me aswell as my own pain.
My boyfriend has been ill too, he was rushed into hospital with a suspected heart attack on Thursday, but thankfully it wasn't, was still a worry though.
Not really looking foward to Easter either because Good Friday is my Mum's birthday. Will go and see her though and take some flowers.
I hope things get better because all I can see is sadness at the moment. Perhaps the Spring will lift us all.
There is one good piece of news though, me and my boyfriend booked our wedding for later on in the year in Las Vegas. My mum knew I wanted to do this and was looking forward to coming, but all of my family have told me to carry on with my plans as my mum would have wanted this.
Just popped on here to see if you’d been. Do you have to go back to the surgery tomorrow then? Are there lots of people working there? You’re right about the pay. These NHS workers are so hard done by. We got a big pay rise quite a few years ago now but we have so many conditions attached and so many extra hours to do now that I don’t think it was worth it, AND we’re falling way behind in the pay stakes again.
I’m so pleased your niece brought the kids round. What a pity you couldn’t go to the cinema though. Never mind –next time. I got the car washed and delivered Benji to the hairdresser. The place is so quiet without him. I’m now trying to defrost the freezer with a hairdryer. It’s taking ages and all my goodies are defrosting now. I’m being dragged out with friends for lunch tomorrow so I’ll have to get the bank before picking up the dog at around four. We are going to some big craft place in the country and I said I would drive so that they’ll have to come away when I’m ready!!! Then they don’t it yet but I’m hoping they will come and look at kitchens and bathrooms with me-how exciting!!
So sorry your feeling down but it’s to be expected and you will get through this-hey you’ve a wedding to plan and look forward to. At the moment just go with how you feel, Nicky-don’t be pushed into anything. Remeber there are outside agencies to help you too. Your poor dad. Losing a patrner after such a long time together must be unberable. Does he stay in a big house? I suppose the longer he’s out of it the harder it will be for him to return. My mum wouldn’t come out of her house when my dad died but I was constantly there and so worried about her as they had always been together. She seemed to be quite fit and healthy at that time but I just needed to be with her and make sure. Little did we know then that even before dad died Mum had cancer.
Anyway Nicky I hope your bf is feeling better now. Did they say what it was and what had caused it? It must have been a real scare for you.
You take care and please come here when you’re feeling down.
