Do people think it is harder to tell parents or children (adult), or their partner?
Hi Ma78 it’s a question that will have different answers depending on any past family cancer history.
I was diagnosed way back in 1999 with my rare incurable but treatable type of Lymphoma (blood cancer)….. there was no question as to my wife knowing as she was with me at all the initial appointments - this is the best way to ensure they understand everything and reduces any confusion.
But as I was not immediately put on any full on treatment for my first 14 years we decided not to tell my and my wife’s parents and our close family manly due to there being past ‘bad’ cancer experiences in the wider family….. the reality was when my Lymohoma became a problem it would be treatable but we would deal with that when required.
Our 2 girls were 14 and 18 at the time so we did tell them and as they had no hang-ups and they accepted that life would go in normal-ish and I did indeed continue to work for 12 years in a demanding teaching job and yes had various treatments over the first 14 years as my Lymohoma was a skin Lymohoma so it looked like I had bad Psoriasis that everyone accepted this on face value.
Then in late 2013 a second rare, more aggressive fast growing Lymphoma came along taking me to stage 4……. so this pressed to start button for 2 years full on treatments…… so this was when we made my diagnosis known to a wider group of family and friends…… but surprisingly there was not any real issues apart from my mum asking me if was going to die….. but we were able to reassure her.
