Well here i am again at 4.30 in the morning and i can't sleep yet again!! My husband Darryl has terminal small cell cancer and, at the moment is going through a really good phase. Which, i would have thought, would set my mind at rest and enable me to sleep. But no, here i am again having had 2 hrs sleep tonight wide awake with mad thoughts running around my head!! This is driving me crazy and i just seem to be on auto pilot all the time. Darryl is 44 years old and we have been given a prognosis of a 2-3 year life span for him. I can't seem to let go of this thought, and maybe part of me can't sleep because of that, as i feel if i'm asleep i'm wasteing precious time!! Darryl is sound asleep and resting well, and if i stay upstairs next to him listening to his breathing, i keep thinking is this the last time i'll ever hear that and end up getting so uptight and worried that i find it better to just get up again. So i wander round the house do a few chores, have a hot caffiene free drink and will myself to sleep all to no avail i might add!! hahaha surely i'm not the only carer who never sleeps, or am i????? any comments gratefully recieved. Take care my friends and hope your all sleeping well. love and hugs mel xxx
hey my chickie Kate long time no speak eh? Thanks babe your support means alot. Hope your still being strong and getting there? Love and hugs MHM xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Hey my chickie Jo Thanks babe for the hug that really made me feel all warm and cared about Hope your ok sweet? Love and hugs your MHM xxxxxxxxxxxxx
PS chickies just gonna make a cuppa be back in a mo xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
hey my chickie rooster charles Babe just being here and listening is enough for me. I feel less alone on here. You don't have to do anything sweet just having friends here makes a real difference. Thank you so much for caring Love and hugs your MHM xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Hey mamma mel Im fine thanks, my concern is for you and daz, and kids much love mate, we your chickies are always gonna be here, thru hail and shine, you can count on us Kate xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
hey my chickie kate i'll be ok babe you know me i'm a tough ole bird!!! hahaha That's why i'm the mumma hen! lol Glad you are a little better sweet i do worry bout you. You know that anyway eh? Are you in uk or Portugal at the mo? love and hugs your MHM xxxxxxxxxxx
Night night heather hope you sleep well and have sweet dreams love and hugs MHM xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
hey my chikie rooster charles ahhhh little Oscar is so sweet. Must take after his grand dad me thinks lol Thats a lovely photo and made me go all goooey!!! Bless him bet he brings a smile to your face everyday? Love and hugs your MHM xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
