Well here i am again at 4.30 in the morning and i can't sleep yet again!! My husband Darryl has terminal small cell cancer and, at the moment is going through a really good phase. Which, i would have thought, would set my mind at rest and enable me to sleep. But no, here i am again having had 2 hrs sleep tonight wide awake with mad thoughts running around my head!! This is driving me crazy and i just seem to be on auto pilot all the time. Darryl is 44 years old and we have been given a prognosis of a 2-3 year life span for him. I can't seem to let go of this thought, and maybe part of me can't sleep because of that, as i feel if i'm asleep i'm wasteing precious time!! Darryl is sound asleep and resting well, and if i stay upstairs next to him listening to his breathing, i keep thinking is this the last time i'll ever hear that and end up getting so uptight and worried that i find it better to just get up again. So i wander round the house do a few chores, have a hot caffiene free drink and will myself to sleep all to no avail i might add!! hahaha surely i'm not the only carer who never sleeps, or am i????? any comments gratefully recieved. Take care my friends and hope your all sleeping well. love and hugs mel xxx
Hello, Sue Butty, i gather you were ok doing that pond, shame you didn't get those gorgeous life guards! I had 'em on duty ready, lol! Saw your post about not wanting to eat.....you really must try, you'll be far too slim otherwise! Promise you'll try? please?
love to all, and hope the race for life went well! xxxxxxxx
Hey Moomy i had my snorkel on so was ok unfortantely lol could have done with a bit of cheerring up today :) pond all done for a while no doubt will have to do it again next month if weather continues i do try with the eating and am trying for the kids sakes really but i feel so ill after eating so dont bother but i will promise you and MHM that i will try a little each day going to drs on Tuesday so will chat to him about it then maybe he will have some answers hows you day been i heard you practising earlier sounded pretty damn good from where i am :) love and hugs chickie sue buttyxxxx
teresa chickie, well done for doing the race for life hunni for everyone, and thank you for adding my mum and dads name to your list, your a real star!! bet you will sleep well tonight
my dear mhm hope today has been ok, and daz has still been drinking, hope kirsty and daley have had a good day
kate, hope your ok and our db, hope she has had a better day, what did you come back with after your shopping spree? not too much crap i hope lol
teresa, hope our baby chick is ok today, did she run in the end? well done again for racing, take it easy tonight now hun
juls, how are you today my friend? hope its been a good day
helen, hope the rehearsals went well, and hope caz is ok, take it easy now hun after all that gardening
foggy, hows your thumb?????????????
lisa, hope youv'e had a good weekend hunni
jacq, hope your dads pain has eased a bit, hope you manage to get an appt for him
shell, hope your ok today babe
donna, thanks for the sunshine again hun, hope your ok and have had a good weekend, oh and hope your pitt model turned back up, i did send it back honest............lol
love and hugs to you all love karen xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
hi karen hunni, my day started off really well, had a salad and turkey pitta bread for my lunch, but once again i am soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo piffed off now i cud kick the crap out of someone, ive had enuf babe i rli have. hope ur ok xoxoxoxoxox
it dont mater hun, its anuva prob at home to top everything off, i rli dont want to be here anymore. i will b ok tho for sum strange reason i always am xoxoxoxox
shell shell shell you know where i am hun if you want to talk seriously like i said last night think of yourself you are one strong person talk to me hun i will be msn shortly for some reason its keeps signing me out so son sorting it out hugs sweetheart xxx
