Well here i am again at 4.30 in the morning and i can't sleep yet again!! My husband Darryl has terminal small cell cancer and, at the moment is going through a really good phase. Which, i would have thought, would set my mind at rest and enable me to sleep. But no, here i am again having had 2 hrs sleep tonight wide awake with mad thoughts running around my head!! This is driving me crazy and i just seem to be on auto pilot all the time. Darryl is 44 years old and we have been given a prognosis of a 2-3 year life span for him. I can't seem to let go of this thought, and maybe part of me can't sleep because of that, as i feel if i'm asleep i'm wasteing precious time!! Darryl is sound asleep and resting well, and if i stay upstairs next to him listening to his breathing, i keep thinking is this the last time i'll ever hear that and end up getting so uptight and worried that i find it better to just get up again. So i wander round the house do a few chores, have a hot caffiene free drink and will myself to sleep all to no avail i might add!! hahaha surely i'm not the only carer who never sleeps, or am i????? any comments gratefully recieved. Take care my friends and hope your all sleeping well. love and hugs mel xxx
hey my chickie Shell I'm here holding your hand if you wanna chat babe remember that I wish i was there to give you a big hug but i'll cyber you one instead (((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))) Hope that helps you feel less lonely and all loved and warm! Love and hugs your MHM xxxxxxxxxxxx
hey my chickie sue butty mophead madwoman! Still smiling i am! lol A BMW talk about going in style! lol You gotta keep ya mophead alert on the road you wombat! lol See why you the mophead madwoman now? lol How you hun did you go to see Kev today? Hope that wasn't too painful for you sweetie Good to hear from you again though me little mophead! lol Love and hugs MHM xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
hey hippy chickie Don Don Get Paul on all fours then whip the bad man!! lol Can just see you doing that too!! Get him barking while his down there then the dog will play and think pauls his bitch! lol Sorry that was a bit over the top!! Hope you forgive me? lol love and hugs silly mood MHM xxxxxxxxx
Thanx MHM, hugs greatfully received hun, sorry have just had a really stressful day wiv meetings about my son and thats just topped all this weeks happenings off for me, and was just saying to donna that ive been told my son is a lil shit, assaulting teachers and peers 'APPARENTLY' because i suffered PND and because of my cancer
Shell, ((((((((((((((((((((((((((())))))))))))))))))))))))))))), life for you is just s**t at present....
MHM, I saw the post and 'thank you for the gold star......(bows to audience) thank you all, thank you very much' (blushes modestly!) hahahahahaha!!!!!!!! Just don't flash that wet lettuce leaf in my direction, lol! Seriously, I do hope Daz will feel better from the new chemo very soon....
Donna, the milk ios worth a try, I looked up my chart and just found 'special remover' listed, but milk is so much more accessible, BUT DON'T BEND OVER to do it yourself!
Hello all other chickies and hope this evening is behaving....
Hey MHM yep only go in style me................... which means it will probably be a three wheeler or something next time lol i just didnt see the bloody thing poor driver didnt even see if it was a man or woman driving inme own little world (nothing new there then) I didnt go today went yesterday i love being there feel so close but hey ho cant stay there forever can i it stefans 17th birthday today and he really missing him today has he would he sent me a text saying .............. mum thankyou for today i know you tried your best i feel that u are the only person who cares for me and them three(2 brothers 1 sister) thankyou anyway how sweet i replied with dont you forget that Kev will always love you and be watching over you do you think this was right? i dont know sometimes me mouth runs away
on a good front no more floods so thats sorted disconnection always sorts things out
love and hugs chickie sue butty mophead madwoman xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
iya strawberry shell squirty cream massive hugs to you ((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))) moomy told you MHM would give you a gold star but dont tell everyone they will all want one ..................shush xxx
