Hello everyone.
I'm sorry if this post seems a bit all over the place, we received news today that my partner's sister has stage 4 cancer. It's been a huge shock. She had her 4th baby in November and started having tummy pains, the hospital kept saying it was an infection, until 5 weeks ago they said it was appendicitis and removed her appendix. Out of the blue she received a phone call asking her to go in to discuss some results. It was then she was told that she had a rare form of cancer found in the appendix. She was due to have a colonoscopy to find out if it had spread and tests to discipher what stage it was. However the hospital messed up her appointment. This morning the news is that the appendix did indeed ruptured and now the cancer has spread. We are waiting for more information from family to determine where it's spread. But it's absolutely broken us..she's so young and with 4 children 3 under 10 (1 being a baby) I'm trying so hard to be strong for my partner and his family. He is just lost and doesn't know what to say or do...and I'm trying to be supportive and say we will do anything even if it is moving back to be nearer her.
I'm sorry for rambling, I just wondered if anybody could possibly give me some advice/support of how to approach supporting everyone . I myself am a new mum, and it's made me so emotional thinking of leaving my son , but I feel guilty for thinking that because it isn't about me at all. But it's given me a wake up call to how precious each day is and to start looking after my health
I'm trying to read things so that my partner doesn't have to remember information or remember what questions to ask.
Sorry again...I guess I just need people to talk to so that I can try and be a support to him and his family in the best way possible.
Thank you all so much for taking the time to read my post xxx
Sorry to read about your partner's sister though certainly you have nothing to apologize about your message; any cancer diagnosis is a shock.
There is quite a good guide on your feelings when someone has cancer and one thing I know I had to recognize was the importance of remembering to look after myself - as they say put on your own oxygen mask first. I find the community great because we share such common experiences
I wish the "being strong" bit was as easy to do as it is to write. I was a bit slower reaching out for help but eventually did. My wife has a rare form of cancer but she was very clear she did not want a prognosis and I struggled with that. In truth of course the doctors can only give a best guess based on averages and with rare cancers those averages are simply not very reliable - 10 years down the line we are living with cancer rather than dying from cancer as the second round chemotherapy my wife had made her cancer stable - I think that even surprised the oncologists.
<<hugs>>
Steve
