Finding it hard to cope today

Hi DawnJ 

That "trying to be brave" bit - so easy to type but delivery is something else. It is great your mum feels she can confide in you and really good too that you have come here to share. Often we find people get so frightened of saying the wrong thing that they can end up saying nothing at all or worse avoiding us totally and that can be really unhelpful.

I know we all hate to see someone upset but I wonder what sort of emotion might show how much you care - often the most practical things can help - there are a range of things that might work on our talking about cancer pages.

Perhaps the most important lesson I had to learn was how to look after myself - often see on here people talking about being selfish but we do need to make time for me if we want to be useful to anyone else.

<<hugs>>

Steve

Hi DawnJ

Your story is similar to mine. Our dad has stage 4 stomach and bowel cancer, he's getting weaker everyday and hardly eats/drinks anything. We also know that he probably doesn't have too long to go. 

Like you, it does get tiring to try and keep it together. I signed up to counselling which helped me have an outlet to share my feelings and have a good cry every week. 

Know that your not alone, there's lots of us here dealing with the same feelings and it is hard. Be kind to yourself. 

Hi All 

Sounds like you are doing a great job supporting your family DawnJ. It’s such a difficult situation to be in, I am sorry that you are all going through this too, sometimes it gets extremely overwhelming and very wearing. I’m sorry to have met you this way but so grateful for all the support from Macmillan.

My dad has had leukaemia for four years and they have recently decided to stop chemotherapy as it is making him too sick and is no longer working. I can’t help but feel angry at the whole situation, my dad is a great dad and is going to miss out on so much, he won’t meet his grandchildren and I know he would have been the best granddad. Is it normal for me to be so angry? 

love and hugs to all xx

Hi Snowy. Thankyou for your reply. I am so sorry to hear about your Dad and the chemo no longer working. It is understandable that you are feeling angry. You are thinking about all the opportunities that he will miss out on like being a grandfather. That is ok to feel like this. I too get anngry knowing my Dad will miss out on family events . Hold onto the time you have with him now and make happy memories that you can tell your children about for years to come.

Love and hugs

Dawn x

Thanks so much Dawn it is surprising how much support from someone you don’t know can help you just push though and keep going. Thanks for your advice I hope you manage to get some happy memories in too xx

Hi Dawn, just read your status and I'm so  sorry to hear about your dad, it's so heart breaking.mum has secondary cancer and I'm devastated that her cancer is treatable but not curable, first chemotherapy gave her cold sepsis , she nearly died from this but recovered, she has her second cycle on Tuesday, what if she contracts if again and doesn't recover? I cry every night and wake up with anxiety, I feel so much for you xx