Hello Everyone,
I'm 32 with two young boys of 4 and 2, due to get married in September next year.
My mum got diagnosed with breast cancer last year in July and then we found out it had spread, liver, spine, thigh.
My mum has lots of other illnesses unfortunately that causes her pain. She has degenerative discs in her spine, the cancer has caused it to crumble and is now trapping her spinal cord.
This is causing her mobility to deteriorate quite quickly.
I haven't ever seen my mum show any emotion to her being diagnosed with cancer.
A month or so ago I found out she has been gambling, today I confronted her, in a nice way and she basically has said she has stopped and won't do it again... I have banned her from all gaming sites.
Anyway, her reason she broke down in tears, what's her purpose?? Why does she even want to be here anymore?? Her pain is hurting so much she can't take anymore pain relief as it will make her so tired she will just be in bed, that's what she doesn't want!
I'm not sure what I want from this post, but all I know is I love my mum she is my only one, I'm her only child and its breaking my heart knowing she is going through this.
Thank you x
Hi Sandybeach
Sorry to read about your mum and all her health conditions. Back issues I can relate to for the opposite reason to your mother in my spine has overgrowth that makes if far less flexible that in should be and can be very painful at times. My mother meanwhile had the opposite with Osteoporosis.
I know when my wife was first diagnosed I tried to hide my tears, did the classic "I have to be strong" bit - but I found for me it did not work so I broke and that did not really help anyone. A bit of help from Maggies and a living with less stress course really helped me get back on track. I learned to appreciate the good days rather than living in fear of a black future that was our of my control. Many milestones I looked forward to in dread did not end up happening in the way I feared. Sometimes of course life throws a curveball but thanks to that stress course I have tools to help me deal with them.
Pain relief is a complex area and getting the balance just right can be very difficult but it is worthwhile talking to experts in this area and looking at Painkillers and cancer to be aware of the range of possible options.
<<hugs>>
Steve
