How to cope

So sorry for your situation, feeling like running is only normal, but I'm afraid the problems just go with you. Having lost both my parents while my children were younger, I can say that they are more resilient than you probably imagine. I found it was good to ask them to help me. Just a cup of coffee, or a quick vacuum, nothing too much, but I think it helped my children to be able to 'do' something and feel useful. Have you tried some mindfullness or just 5 mins of yoga or stretching? I do a good few deep breaths while I'm in the shower each morning... just a minute or two a day that is just for you. xxx

Thank you for your reply its so reassuring that someone understands. Thank you for the advise I am really lucky to life close to the sea so that's my relaxation a swim really helps my mind. Also a cold shower to start the day is my next step to try to calm me down.  Thank you again xx

My heart goes out to you. I feel the same; my mom has just ended her treatment and I like you, feel like I live with this constant time bomb and it’s awful. 
You must make time for you; whatever makes you smile or even forget for just a few minutes. Distraction can be helpful at times so whatever that may be for you, find time. I laughed so hard at something someone said at work yesterday and it felt so good to feel laughter. I instantly felt guilty but then I remembered that my mom loves to laugh and she wouldn’t want me not to laugh. 
I find this group so helpful, keep coming back and I’m sending you all my love x

Thank you so much it makes a huge difference to me reading the messages. Laughter sometimes is the best therapy just a moment to forgot this horrendous time bomb we live in also cold showers certainly make you forget everything just fior a few minutes, to busy trying to breathxx my mum likes to laugh and I'm so blessed to have a wonderful mum. Sending all love and best wishes xxx