Hi all,
I’m new here, I need some advice on how to help my parents. My mum was diagnosed with advanced melanoma last year, it’s been a whirlwind since then but she’s reacted well to treatment but has had some complications and now has epilepsy.
Her current medication is making her extremely tired and she is becoming weaker. My dad is at home with her and has stepped up to help more but they are beginning to become so frustrated with each other. I think part of the problem is that they are both stubborn and are used to doing their own thing, which obviously can’t happen at the moment.
I have other siblings but tend to be the mediator but I’ve hit a wall today and I’m not sure that I’m actually helping. I’ve sent them both the support line number and have told them to talk to someone independent of us but I don’t think either of them have.
Does anyone have any suggestions or advice on how to deal with this? Thank you
Hi
Sorry to hear about your parents and the impact they are having on you. I wonder how they would feel if they realised how this was impacting on you. Do remember you are more than welcome to ring the helpline too.
Is the medication your mum is on for the epilepsy or is it cancer related? If the tiredness is a result of the medication if might be worth talking to the doctors about this. Being tried makes everything more difficult.
Sometimes it can help to encourage people to remember the things they enjoy that they can still do.
For your dad it might help to look at Your feelings when someone has cancer - I know I had to learn to look after my own emotions and perhaps men are not always as good at that as we might me. Now I find my emotions are much closer to the surface than they were before cancer and I had to learn how to manage that.
<<hugs>>
Steve
