My mum was diagnosed with incurable cancer when I was 10, and I’m 18 right now. A couple months ago she got on this new treatment, and it has been treating her like shit. She has all these scabs on her head that ooze and it’s just all around gross. She’s always exhausted, sleeps 15+ hours a day, is in pain, the whole package.
And I’m so angry and disgusted at it. And so guilty that I feel that way.
She’s always asking us to do stuff for her (which is fine) but does it in this whining, pitiful voice like she thinks she needs to act pathetic and weak in order for us to want to help her and that too makes me angry and disgusted but guilty that I feel that way.
I want to want to take care of her and be that carer for her but I get sick when she acts like that. I feel bad for saying it like it’s a choice. It’s just that she’ll be like that then turn around and act normally and I’m resentful that she has to act like a child (I know that sounds terrible) around me. I don’t need to be guilt tripped into bringing meals to my mum. I don’t know who to talk about it to. I can’t tell anyone in my family, obviously, and none of my friends know.
She’s always seemed so strong and like an /adult/ and I hate that she regresses like this, as unreasonable expecting her to be strong all the time is.
Hi Artic Chicken,
Thank you so much for joining the forum and sharing some of your journey with us.
You write with such passion, and such pain, I just wanted to say, that I Hear you!
HERE you will find others who, like you are caring for someone special who has a diagnosis, You will find that the way you feel is not something to be guilty for. If you think that it will be of interest, please take a look.
Take care of you also, stay strong
Lowe'
