Sister who has terminal cancer

Hi and welcome to the online community

I'm very sorry to read that your sister has secondary breast cancer. It must be an incredibly hard time for you both, not helped by the travel restrictions in place because of coronavirus.

I can understand why you're struggling with your emotions and wondered if you'd taken a look at this information from Macmillan on your feelings when someone has cancer. There's lots of practical tips on how to look after yourself emotionally and you can always give the Support Line a call on 0808 808 0000 if you feel that talking to someone would help.

Could I suggest that you also join the supporting someone with incurable cancer group as you may well find someone in that group who's in the same position as you. To join just click on the link I've created.

Sending a supportive ((hug))

Hello Snowdrops61,

I'm really sorry to hear about your sister. I am in a very similar situation. I live 70 miles away from my sister and she has breast cancer which has spread to her bones and bowel and peritoneum. She has been fighting for the past 4 years, she is currently in a Macmillan palliative care unit and not allowed visitors. She is declining rapidly and its heart breaking.

I have added you as a friend and happy to chat.

Hello. Sorry I took so long to reply. I really am struggling with navigating around this site and its took me ages to get to this point of replying to you. So please bear with me. Yes my youngest sister was diagnosed last April. This is her second time with breast cancer. Now it has spread and in terminal. But she is still fighting it at the moment. If she hadn't chosen to have chemo she would have died within 3 months. But we don't know how long they can keep it all at bay. She is currently on some sort of hormone treatment now  not sure how this will keep it at bay  it is very difficult not being able to get up to Scotland and she is in isolation anyway  on top of that she has been told if she catches this corona virus she will not get a ventilator because she is terminal  I have no idea what will happen next  I'm sure you will feel the same  its all so unfair I know what will happen in the end  and I'm dreading it  I'm no stranger to cancer  I've another sister who had breast cancer and is ok  for now  my parents both died of cancer  my sister who has cancer at the moment is waiting on scan results of whether it has spread to stomach chest etc etc  hard times  it's a waiting game  it's constantly on my mind  is it the same for you  

Hello sorry took so long to reply. Am finding it hard to navigate this website. Took me ages to get to this point. Thanks for the links. I will look at them. Just need time to get the hang of this site. I am an administrator for the local government so am used to computers. But I am struggling with this site. It seems to be all over the place. 

Hi

I'm sorry that you're having trouble navigating the website. There are various ways to get back to a thread that you've created. Firstly, when you log on if you click on your username at the top of the page you will see 'my latest activity'. If you click on that you'll see any posts you've recently made.

Another way is to click on 'save this discussion in my favourites' when you start a post.

If you need anymore help just respond to this post and I'll try my best.

x

Hi, you really have had a tough time of it.

Yes, it is really hard waiting and watching. My sister got taken to A and E 2 weeks ago and was triaged and admitted with potential covid patients for 2 days before they would let her go to the Cancer unit. We knew she didn't have covid, she had only been discharged 2 weeks before after having RT and chemo and hadn't left the house. They discharged her with fluid on her lungs , that they didn't want to treat due to risk of infection, and then they put her in with everyone else. It was really worrying, but she has been tested twice now and is negative for covid. Thank goodness.

Being in AandE they told her they would not resuscitate. This was the first time she had been told anything like this and was all alone at the time. It is a really helpless and hopeless situation at times. 

Are you able to video call? This option has been a Godsend for me. Does your sister have other family around her ?

Xxx

Hi. I use face time to communicate with her. I have sister in Canada. One down in Southampton and a brother somewhere in the world. We don't know where he is have not heard from him for about 15 years. All us girls married military men so we are spread out. We are not a close family. We grew apart having married soldiers. However I am closest to my youngest sister ( I am the eldest) who is the one who is terminal.  It's all so complicated. A broken family I suppose. It happens I guess.  Am so sorry to hear about your situation too. All very stressful especially in these uncertain times. In this coved situation it seems like people who are terminal are sort of left if anything happs. Anyway thank you for replying to me. I'm slowly getting used to this site and finding the replies

Hello,

Sorry for a long wait. My sister has taken a turn for the worse, although has picked up again the past 2 days. How are things with you? 

Xx