emotions

Hey and welcome, I'm glad you found us and I'm glad you're finally able to speak honestly with us, but im so sorry for the reason you find yourself here. 

My heart goes out to you, it really does. I know what it's like to have mental health, I have depression and anxiety too, and add onto that a diagnosis of someone you are so close to, and you end up where we are now. 

In terms of how to show how much you love him, honestly, just being there for him will show everyone that. Living with your grandad (like I do too!) Means you're there for every time. Like times when he gets upset, angry, or just wants a hug. Or times when he just wants to talk about anything he can think of. You being there for him shows how much you love him. And if things get hard for him physically, giving him a hand with day to day things can help too. All of these things show how much you care, but I promise you, he will absolutely know how much you love him, without you having to show it. You're being there for him, and your his granddaughter who he probably thinks the world of, he probably doesnt need much more. 

With yourself and your mental health and emotional issues, just make sure you take a little time for yourself. Even if its 5 minutes, so that you know, you've had time to try controlling your own emotions and feelings. Have you tried guided meditation? There are some apps about and websites that offer that, and doing it just before bed will calm you and maybe help you to sleep too. To let all those feelings out, you can of course come here and vent about anything you want to. Honestly, anything. I'll be here and so will others from our wonderful community. But if there are things you want to keep to yourself, but still let out, maybe try keeping a journal. Write exactly how you're feeling, whether its angry or sad or anything inbetween. But, when you've finished your journal entry, add a 'Positive Of The Day' in there too. It may be something huge or something small. But finding the positives in each day I find makes all the difference, and you can look back at all your positives when you're feeling down, and remember what made you write them and what those positives were actually like. 

I hope this helps even just a tiny bit. But I'm glad you've found us, and as I said, anytime you want anyone to vent to or talk cancer with, or anything else! We are here. You're never alone, and you're being a superstar with your grandad. 

Lots of love and healing to you, your grandad and your family, 

Alex xxxx