Having a bad day

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Sorry but I'm having a bad day and I just need to let it out.  I woke up feeling like I've had no sleep and really down.  Mum's been bad this week - a lot of pain and, I think, sliding into depression - so I'm in overdrive on worrying about her.  My sister is with her today so I don't need to go round to see mum although I probably will drop round later.  I thought I would throw myself into cleaning the house so make myself busy and then I'd start to feel better.  My fatal mistake was asking my 18 year old daughter to help.  She had a major strop.  I tried to keep calm as I realise that she is worrying about my mum too but it was hard.  I tried to talk to her but she just got worse and worse so I gave up.  Then my husband made sarcastic comments about it all - again he is worrying and his mum is also not well - so I am still trying to keep a lid on it.  But I feel even worse now.  I'm now sitting on the sofa in my pyjama's watching old episodes of Grey's Anatomy without the will to do anything else.  I just keep crying and feel so very very sad. 

  • I guess you are right she knew we all loved her still can’t belive our journey is over I feel for every one who is not as far on as I am sending all my love to those people x 

  •  Michelley 

    Im so very sorry to hear that. sending my love and a  massive hug to you x

  • Missing my mum so much tonight.

    Wondering how my virtual family are doing.

    X

    Elenium

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to Elenium

    Also up tonight, your virtual family is still very much with you - taking each day as they come - (some better than others) xx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to Elenium

    Also up tonight, your virtual family is still very much with you - taking each day as they come - (some better than others) xx

  • Hugs. X

    Elenium

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to Elenium

    Elenium

    I hope I am part of your virtual family - maybe a distant cousin - but I think about you all a lot.

    We are carrying on carrying on, like you do.

    Now over 3 years of chemo every fortnight for hubby - can't plan anything ahead in case the weeks get shifted due to issues but we soldier on with our new normal.

    Just wish I wasn't one of the women caught in the gap where we worked all our lives believing we would retire at 60 only to have the goalposts moved - now to 67.

    I feel this forum is one of the few places you can really say what you feel without fear of recrimination or misunderstanding and that is a real godsend.

    Sadly I don;t have the eloquence and gentle humour played out alongside the sadness that your original thread has

    Love to you all

    Zoe

  • Hi elenium I’m sad that u having a bad day I haven’t been on here for a while but I got a email and wanted to jump in and say hi . It’s only been 8 weeks since mom passed seams like a lifetime we are sorting all her stuff out dad wants us to . And we doing it for him it’s heartbreaking really. I miss her so much I have actually had a few tears today . But I after go to work now so I put it behind me in a virtual box . I miss her so much the texting and phoning it’s awful I hope she can see me still !!! Dad as bought me the ashes ring so she can be with me every day it’s not arrived yet and I have had it engraved inside with my nick name she used to call me . So I’m sending hugs and love to any body that needs the support love to all x  

  • Hi Zoe,

    Sending you a big hug. It's so shit! I'm sorry it's been like this for you both.

    I also felt (feel) that you can speak on here honestly and no one judges you. That's part of what saved me. That and my virtual family.I hope it does the same for you.

    I've been asked to be part of an inclusion group at work and they've asked me to put something together for carers week. So today I've been thinking about this forum and mum. It made me a bit sad but reminded to have a look on here. I don't seem get emails anymore when people reply.

    Take care.

    Xxx

    Hi Zoe,

    Sending you a big hug. It's so shit! I'm sorry it's been like this for you both.

    I also felt (feel) that you can speak on here honestly and no one judges you. That's part of what saved me. That and my virtual family.I hope it does the same for you.

    I've been asked to be part of an inclusion group at work and they've asked me to put something together for carers week. So today I've been thinking about this forum and mum. It made me a bit sad but reminded to have a look on here. I don't seem get emails anymore when people reply.

    Take care

    Elenium