Having a bad day

Elenium,

I'm not Surprised you've had enough!!! Let's just pray that your hubby can get back some life in him. It's probably been triggered by all the heartache you've all gone through this past year. 

I send you much Love my friend, and to  ALL our virtual family

Love Sue

Xx

Hi Elenium sorry to read that your situation just seems so relentless it’s difficult to comprehend what you and your family are going through and I hope better times are here soon for you , it’s time for it to stop , you have had far more than your fair share 

Had a Facebook invite to a party from my beloved Jill’s brother this weekend, really?? Are you serious?? After 10 months of no contact, no call no text no visit to me or my boys just to say hello or how are you? Nothing at all and now as you are arranging a party for your sons 30th you want us to come? .....#*&k off !! I honestly don’t understand people and nothing ceases to surprise me anymore, it’s obviously all over for that part of Jill’s family, Jill is dead and has been for almost a year so they are over it . Anyway they can stick their invite where the sun don’t shine . After a tragedy like I and all of you have suffered you really find out about those who rally care about you and it’s those people who I will spend my time with not the total waste of space that was Jill’s family , so great full I found this site, this link and this page as I know my totally bonkers rant will be understood by you 

Hope the coming week is kind to you all 

Thank you Sue and Yantibee.  I just keep pushing myself onward hoping that it'll be nothing serious.  

Yantibee, I do completely get where you are coming from.  I've had a few 'friends' crawl out of the woodwork in the last couple of months that weren't there for me.  I've just ignored them.  As I said before, there is absolutely no excuse for abandoning us in our time of need so we certainly don't want them around now.  

On my way to work, luckily my boss is off for the week so that helps.  I'm going to speak to the head of my department about situation with husband, she will be much more understanding. My boss goes through the motions but I don't think he really means it.  I feel like he's saying the things he knows he should say but in his head he's thinking "Why can't she just get on with it"

Hugs to you all.

X

Hello my friends. I still read and feel. Elenium, one day at a time, just one day at a time.hope head boss is empathic, makes a world of difference when one feels heard. I hear you all loud and clear. Yantibee, its the limitations of others which highlights your strength - their lack of kindness makes your huge heart shine. They are mere bottom of the sea feeders, those fish taste bad, they do however have a self serving role in their World. Sadly, its my immediate family member who is the greatest bottom feeder. The one person who could understand if she chose to. charity work my arse, self serving bottom feeder.... Lost and found Is a theme for me at the monent. Just hope my findings help heal my madness which is grief, stress & menopause!

I am currently sitting in the hospital waiting for husband to have his colonoscopy.  He's been in there since 1.30 ish.  They said it would be about 2 hours.  Before he went in he asked me if I had prepared myself for bad news.  I haven't, because part of me thinks it'll be ok.  Not sure if I'm fooling myself.  I'm usually pretty good at knowing when it's going to be serious or not, although I can never tell with myself only other people. Perhaps I can't tell for him either, as he's too close to me.

I've managed to distract myself so far watching things on iPlayer but I can't do it anymore so thought I would write on here instead.  My head is pounding and I'm starting to feel sick.  When he went in I just wanted to burst into tears.  It's still threatening.  Oh God I hope everything is ok. I don't know what I would do if it's not.

What makes it worse is that I'm sitting in exactly the same seat I sat in last time mum was here.  Not happy memories.  This is so shit!

Hi Elenium

This is so difficult we are dealt with the most unfair hand if cards.

I  am thinking if you and keeping my fingers crossed for both of you. 

Dearest Elenium, 

It must be awful just waiting. Sending you love and hugs

Sue xxx

There's no cancer! What a relief. He's got to go back in two weeks to have the camera down his throat. More worry then. He's had a chest x-ray too. He gets the results in a couple of days.

Oh Thank Goodness for that!! 

Love Sue

Xx

Elenium,

Have been following your posts, so so sorry about this, nobody should go through all this again and again. but

That’s great great amazing news. Keep focusing on that positive,

Big big hug and love.

Xxx