Having a bad day

Just reading your posts.  Been painting walls and gardening all weekend. Now tired.

Want to tell Mum about her cottage and the plants. Anything I need to move from where she had it I want to put back exactly as she had it.  

Maisiemae...things are annoying me more and more...boyfriend talking to his mum ...people just generally existing near me...normality irritating. ...

Bobles that made me smile about the sparrows bathing. 

Glad you got your mum's birdbath Elenium.

Got back to London and all are grumpy here. 

Night all.

Jx

It's hard isn't it.  I bought some plants to put in the garden.  I can never remember what they are called but it begins with oste and they look a bit like daisies.  Anyway, they have loads of them in Cornwall and mum loved them.  I could never get them to grow in my old garden so thought I've give them a go in this one.  Fingers crossed they take and it'll be something else to make me think of mum. 

I so wanted to talk to mum at the weekend.  I've had so much going on and I just needed her.  My youngest got really upset last night and told me how much she misses her nan.  I told her that my mum always knew the right thing to say or do when I was upset but I haven't got to her level yet.  I don't always know the right thing to say or do to make her feel better.  I'm not sure I'll ever get as good at that as mum.

Hugs to all.

X

Elenium,

Sounds to me like you are treading in your mum's footsteps. Being honest with your daughter like you were is so the right thing, don't doubt yourself, easy to say though.

Osteospernum daisies? My mum liked them too.

On with the day, meeting with the doctor at lunch time ref MIL blood test results.

Xxx

I need a selfish rant....here it is...

I phoned solicitors as they've assigned only half a garden to Dad from Mums house. ..arghh

Cancelled sussex voting papers

Cancelled Sussex bus pass

Phoned TV licence people  (we need to pay when next down there).

Sis started going on and on and on about weight gain as put on a pound....I said she looks lovely. .she said photos say otherwise. ..

I couldn't take it any more I've had these conversations for years and years with her as she has weight issues although is now thin but now I just can't. 

I said I'm stopping the conversation here it's getting on my nerves.

Not a happy sister.

Also people get used to me not retaliating...always a shock if I do.

Sorry am rambling...

Hope all coping OK out there?

Jx

Thanks Bobles.  Yes they are osteospernum daisies.  Mum always loved them.

Hope the MIL blood test is ok.

X

Not selfish at all Jenny.  Sometimes you've just got to let it all out and where better than here??  And you should retaliate more often.  I know it's hard - I'm not very good at confrontation with family - but sometimes it just has to be done.

X

Jenny, I too have become less tolerant of the whingers/moaners in my life! I want to scream "Try losing a parent & a partner  in 6 months of each other!! 

On Sunday evening I was listening to Classic FM as usual. A piece of music came on I'd  never heard before. I can't  even remember what it was now, but suddenly I felt this huge sadness. I wanted Alan with me so much!! Since then I've  been  having the strangest dreams. Not nightmares, just very strange. 

I'm  also feeling suddenly guilty if I feel like I'm  enjoying myself "too much". Why now? 

It seems we're  all struggling at the moment, so I send you all Hugs and Happy Thoughts.

Sue 

Xx

Maybe you'll hear it again if it's on their regular play list?

Sister gone out this evening so hope for a better mood to come.

Dad poorly. Know he's got some infection but had 3 lots of antibiotics but we need to know what infection is as they've not worked. Thursday is seeing consultant as there's something on his chest x ray.

Don't want to hear cancer or metastases. ..

Jx

Evening all, need to share ...

MIL Blood results as bad as you could get, leukaemia probable but can't be confirmed without a bone marrow biopsy. MIL not strong enough for that, doctor believes she would probably bleed to death if they did do it. Platelet level 40, normal  150-400.Decision with MIL as to next steps.

Am I a Jonah?

Xxx

Dreadful news.  Without the marrow biopsy what options were suggested?

Nightmare for you to be here again discussing disease.

How aware is MIL?

jx