New, autistic and scared

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Pls be kind, this is all very new to me and frankly I’m petrified. I’m desperate to find other autistic womxn who are in or around their early 40s who can relate to this or similar (not that I know what similar looks like, I’m that new to this):

GP found lump

Hospital did mammogram, ultrasound and physical examination; found enlarged lymph nodes in armpit.

Biopsy showed cancerous cells.

Now going through more tests; MRI, CT and bone scan.

Won’t know results for another couple of weeks.

I’m scared. I don’t know what to do or what to think. I’ve been told breast cancer can come or show in more than one form.

I’m late diagnosed autistic, I’ve not found a support group specifically designed for autistic (or neuro divergent people in general) and the big C yet.

All I want to do is withdraw between tests. And the waiting is doing my head in: my patience jumped ship the moment the word cancerous was heard.

I was already trying to navigate burnout amid my other responsibilities - so I felt the weight of this news. The uncertainty of what’s to come is severely disrupting and impacting upon everything. I don’t have an autism support dog yet either.

Part of hating the wait is also being driven by the fear of whilst I wait, whatever it is, has the chance to spread. That’s not helpful at all. I’ve already got to the point that if it’s in the breast too, they can both go. Take whatever lymph nodes too.

If you are like me, pls respond.

  • Hi Lyta Alexander, i am so sorry to hear of your diagnosis. I am not neuro divergent myself but there was/is a young lady who was on the macmillan community with the username Lanamer. I hope this helps, PS we all get scared and frightened when told we have cancer, take care.

    Eddie

  • Hello  thank you for that info. Pls don’t misunderstand me - of course we all become scared with such news. I’d like to connect with other autistic womxn because they’re more likely to have similar needs and/or experiences to me, eg sensory processing disorder or helpful tips on managing burnout. 

  • Hi Lyta i have a little understanding as i was in healthcare for many years and supported people with autism for 3 years, though, as they say until you have had something you can never really understand, can I ask are you a babylon5 fan, 

    Eddie