Cancer through covid

Hi

That's a lot of stuff to be dealing with, and sounds like you are propping up loads of people and need a bit of TLC yourself. If you havent already then I would suggest you join the Carers group for support as it seems to be  an active forum where people will understand what you are up against.

xx

Thank you I not used to sharing how I feel about this hope you are well xx

Hi 

I too am a teacher and I received my diagnosis of TNBC just before Christmas 2019 which meant that I have been having treatment during Covid. I also care for my elderly mother, 89, who has been knocked sideways by the isolation and we too have only had phone calls to sustain us as we have both been shielding since the start. I have two children, older than yours, one of whom has suffered terribly from anxiety and depression. My beautiful grandson is nine and I miss seeing him so much. I returned to work last June and have been teaching online since then . What you wrote resonated so much with me and you can probably see how difficult I’m finding it to write about this here. I feel that that bucket of resilience that I’ve always carried with me is sorely depleted and I know that for those I love most dearly I have always been the one they rely on  and that has been sorely tested. On the positive side however, one of the groups I teach are older students with autism and learning difficulties and I have have been bolstered by their unquestioning acceptance of and ability to deal with our altered state. All I can advise is that you take each day as it comes, do what you can and if you are like me, learn to put some time aside for you and use every friend and positive aspect of these dreadful times to support and sustain you. I’ll be thinking of you and if I can help in any way please let me know.

Flora21 

(aka Pat) 

Hi OP,

I am very new to this site but reading your story has made me want to reach out, I also find it really difficult to share but I'm hoping being part of this network will help. Covid has been so tough I have found for my family who are all vulnerable medically and this unexpected diagnosis of my Step Dad on top of it has really got on top of us all. I especially connect with those feelings of helplessness you have mentioned. I am usually the person who tries to get everyone else to look on the positive side of things but I am finding myself feeling increasingly drained and down as the months go on, which I can't afford because if i'm not making everyone look on the bright side who will. It sounds like you understand that a bit with what you are going through and how you usually keep everyone's spirits up. TBH I actually feel guilty at the moment for not being able to pick myself up to in turn pick everyone else up, do you feel like that too? 

The reason why I have joined this community is because I am hoping that I can find some answers, talk things out without feeling guilty for my feelings, get some support and hopefully get to a place where I can support other people too because we are going through stuff other people in our wider lives (work/friends/partners etc) aren't.

Like I said this is my first post on someone else's message and I hope you don't mind me doing so. It's where you said you feel like a fraud, i'm new to Cancer being in my life and I haven't  quite organised my thoughts and feelings on it all but overwhelming I feel like a fraud. But I don't think we should.

Anyway, sending love xxx