Hi, feeling quite overwhelmed at the moment. Mum is 79, diagnosed with ovarian cancer in December. She was very poorly with ascites but with chemo the cancer has reduced. Unfortunately the cancer is very aggressive and prognosis isn’t good. She has been offered the ultra radical surgery but she is unsure whether to go for it. The operation is massive and I’m not sure it’s the best thing for her.
She is doing well at the moment and is driving and seeing friends. She is so scared about the op and she’s already said she doesn’t want to let the docs down if she decides against the op but she’s not sleeping at night and I really don’t know how to help her. I know it needs to be her decision but I feel so helpless.
I’m trying to look after myself but it’s becoming increasingly harder to balance life - I work full time, have a home, 2 grown up boys (26 and 27) who have been an amazing support to me. I am going to arrange to speak to someone at MacMillan as this is all getting too much. I also feel guilty for feeling like this as I’m not the one going through it, it’s mum who has the cancer! My brother is also not much help as he lives about an hour and half away so isn’t around for the day to day ups and downs. Sorry for the brain dump, thanks for reading
Hi Molly13
Welcome to our community, I hope you find it both informative and supportive.
Sorry to hear about your mum, for me it is my wife with the cancer though in her case it has been stable for about 10 years now.
The difficult decisions around treatment can be a real challenge and all anyone can do is get as much information as possible before making the right decision for them.
Something that helped me was looking at your feelings when someone has cancer as being able to recongize these emotions and accept them as normal and valid helped to make them just a little less overwhelming.
I was lucky too that I got a lot of support from my GP, even being signed off when things got too much.
<<hugs>>
Steve
