Mums terminal cancer - struggling with her support, feeling alone

Hi Snowdrp 

Welcme to our community, I hope you find it both informative and supportive.

Sorry to hear about your parents, that feeling of lonliness is very common as we can see in the pages on the emotional effects of caring

Have your parents had a needs assessment? You should also be able to get a carers assessment to try to help ensure you get the support you need too

Do post on here whenever as someone is always listening and if you want remember the helpline is open from 8am to 8pm on 0808 808 0000 - I have certainly cried at them in the past.

<<hugs>>

Steve

Thankyou so much for ur  message x

Oh I’m so sorry, I’m afraid I don’t have any helpful experience but I just wanted to say you sound like an incredible kind, caring daughter. I bet your parents are so proud. Even though it feels so hard right now, you’ll never regret being there for them. Keep reaching out for help! 

Hi Snowdrp, 

Big hug and well done for reaching out. 

Knowing what help is out there for you and how to access it is difficult. Macmillan is a good start along with Citizens Advice. You may have a hospice in your area that you can approach for help and support. 

I'm fortunate that at work, only the need to know have the full information.  It gives me respite. Colleagues are only aware that I have stuff going on and leave me be. 

2023 we were able to call on carers and Marie Curie for end of life at home for MIL.. Ask for the help. 

This time is my husband. Not sure how I'll cope but I'll take any help I can find. 

Hugs for you lovely lady. 

That is very kind thku 

I'm sure u will find the strength becus we have to but I wish u all the love   and help there is x

Hi,  not sure where you live but there is a supportive network out there,  you just need to find it.  Start with your Doctor.  They should be able to provide contacts with Social Services, Carer networks, District nurses, Day care etc.  You shouldnt do this alone.  Look at getting your parents a care package.  Carers will take the strain and it means you have some quality of life.  There are also people in the local area that are happy to come in and sit with people for a small cost to give you a break.  It's amazing once you start the ball rolling how many people are out there are willing to offer help.  Join local FB communities and ask the questions, try your local church ( you dont have to be religious for them to help).  Your parents may fight against others being involved, but you need to ignore their protests if its for their own safety.  We would say tgry are coming in to help support us and told mam it meant she could stay in her own home.  By the time she moved into a care home for Palliative care i would say to her she had more visitors than the queen!