Scared for the future

Hi Vicky. 

Im sorry to read about your situation, being a carer for a partner who has a low life expectancy is hard, mentally and emotiinally.  Im no longer caring for my husband as he passed away 8 months ago but watching him go downhill and then die was so tough. 

Its ok to cry and tell people how hard it is. Lean on anyone, friends, neighbours, family. Even if its a cup of tea or some shopping or hoovering, it all helps.

There are a couple of things. Macmillan are great at going through eg benefits. He could get PIP fast tracked if life expectancy reduces to 12 months and the cancer nurses can help get that done. If you husband was/is working he may be abke to get ill health retirement which woild release his pension pot.

In terms of other support, is there a hospice near you, if so can you get referred in. Ours were great, and still support me now. Also look at carer groups, I never got to one but they can help as somewhere to talk with others in a similar position.

Finally when your husband is well enough, just spend as much time together as you can with your family. Those memories will be important for you and your girls. Of course life expectancy is only a typical, I know of people sho have lived many years longer. Sadly for my husband, he was given 12 to 18 months but got just 12.

Kepp talking here too.

hugs to you

I realize this is from a while ago, but I'm curious about how you're doing, Vicky. Have you managed to find the support you needed for financial planning or your daughter's care? Don’t hesitate to share any updates or ask for more advice. Sometimes, just talking it through with others in similar situations can make a difference.