My husband collapsed 18 months ago and was diagnosed with bowel cancer. We were told the tumour was bulky but curable with surgery. What followed was a nine hour operation to remove the tumour and four rounds of chemo. We were told then it had been successful. We had a very good few months where he was recovering well. We’d even booked a wee trip away, then came the yearly scan which showed the cancer had returned with spots on the liver and a tumour outside the bowel. He has been given 6 to 12 months and was given option to have more chemo to possibly extend his lifespan. He has opted for this and is now on Round 3. He has been so ill with the chemo he is exhausted and depressed. I can’t bear to see him suffer and wonder if it would have been better to not opt for more treatment and try and live with some quality of life for a few more months. I want to help but he won’t talk about anything to me as he thinks he is shielding me from the saddest time but it’s the opposite. I need to talk. I’m finding it harder to get to see my friends as I don’t like leaving him. It’s a very sad limbo for us both. Is there anyone who is feeling the same. We’ve been married for 45 years and we used to do everything together and it stopped so suddenly.
Hi JillW
Sorry to hear about what you are going through. It is not that uncommon when sometimes people feel that sharing might be overwhelming and perhaps we did some of that in the past but we did get to a point where that was not going to work anymore.
Remember the helpline is there for you too if you need to talk to someone - 0808 808 0000, it is open 8am to 8pm 7 days a week.
<<hugs>>
Steve
