Am I a monster?

Thank you I hope your breast cancer treatment goes well xx

I wanted to reach out and share a bit about what I’ve been going through, as I believe in the power of community and shared understanding.

I am currently caring for my mum, who is in palliative care, and it’s been an incredibly challenging and emotional journey. The past weekend was particularly hard—my mum wasn’t eating or drinking, and I struggled to get the help I needed despite multiple calls for medical assessment. Juggling this alongside my work, my two children, and four pets has left me feeling overwhelmed, lonely, and exhausted.

I often feel a mix of sadness, frustration, and helplessness, and I sometimes find it hard to keep up the strength and positivity that my mum deserves. It’s a lonely experience, and I know I’m not alone in these feelings, but it’s still difficult to carry everything on my own.

I just wanted to share my feelings openly here and know that I’m not alone in this. If anyone has advice, support, or simply understands what it’s like, I would be grateful to hear from you.

Thank you for listening and for being part of this community. Sending lots of love and strength to everyone on this difficult journey.

I hear you. I'm losing my husband a little more each day. He is struggling to swallow now and can only talk in a feint whisper (& I'm deaf). The nursing home think he has oral thrush - but would you believe it - they are struggling to get a GP to visit so that he can be given meds which may help. A lot of this terminal journey has been exacerbated by medical shortcomings, errors and incompetence. I wonder if you feel, like me, that people just do not care - due to the terminal diagnosis. It's bad enough watching your loved one suffer, without our broken health care system making things worse. I hope you have a better week ahead. Sending love to you. I've often found that, when I'm in the depths of despair, the following day can often be very different and light shines through. I try and hang on to that X

Thank You for your message . This journey of caring for a loved one, especially my mum, has been the hardest thing I’ve ever faced. I often hear, “Here if you need us,” but when it truly comes to support, it feels like no one is really interested or available. It’s a lonely, painful experience, and I’m so sorry for all the pain everyone here is going through.

Caring for someone you love, and not knowing how they truly feel inside, breaks your heart every single day. I used to try to live day by day, but right now, it’s hour by hour. I find myself sleeping on the sofa, just in case I miss that last cry for help. It’s exhausting, heartbreaking, and yet we keep going — because what choice do we have?

I wish everyone love and, reluctantly, hope. We’re all just trying our best in these difficult times. I truly feel for my children witnessing all of this — it’s rubbish and so painful. But I believe that “what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger,” and somehow, we support each other through these darkest moments.

Thank you for allowing us to rant here without judgment. It helps to know we’re not alone, and that we can share these feelings openly.

Sending lots of love and strength to everyone on this journey. xx