Bit lost

Hi Bit Lost, 

So sorry to hear what you and your family are going through. You are absolutely right when you say that you feel like you have won the worst kind of bingo! You have so much to cope with all at once! 

I find this community is such a support at difficult times. My husband’s diagnosis of stage 4 bowel cancer was 10 months ago (it had spread to liver lungs and adrenal glands. The chemo has helped a lot and in a crazy way we have got accustomed to the treatmen.

tYou might find a chat with Macmillan helps too? 

I'm not sure if this is any help to you but you but I am sending you a big hug. 

Xx 

Thanks for your message, it's so very appreciated. Do you mind me asking what your husbands treatment looks like? I know it will be different for all but just trying to get some ideas? I'm so sorry you're going through this, it's tough enough it being my dad, I think it being your spouse is altogether a different challenge and my heart goes out to you x

Hi Flic

Thank you for your message - not a problem but thanks, it has been a lot to get used to! 

Our children are in their early 20s and both came to a couple of appointment with us. We try to talk about it a lot.

- he has just chemo as he was quite unwell by the time he started treatment. It is given fortnightly.This is how it goes in his case, so it may be quite different for your Dad. He has a lot of tablets to take each day! But they help with nausea and other side effects.

The treatment begins with a timed appointment with his care team on Monday - bloods taken height and weight recorded.

The bloods were used to assess his health and readiness for the chemo. 

On Wednesday (48 hours later ) he goes back to the hospital for a timed appointment. They check him again and give him some meds- anti sickness and steroids I think - then he is fitted up with the pipework for the chemo. He sits in a large comfortable armchair surrounded by other patients who are also on their chemo journey.Its usually quite sociable if they are feeling well enough.

The tubes are flushed through and then two senior nurses bring out the chemo drugs and after checking his details he is attached and the first dose takes an hour or so. The pipes are flushes again and the process repeated.

The last dose is given via a pump which is attached to his belt as he comes home with it. It takes another 48 hours after which he goes back to have it removed. We call the pump “Bob”. Daft but there you are!

I went with him for the first couple of rounds of the chemo and I go to the care team appointments every time if I can. My husband takes himself off for the chemo on his own now.

It becomes familiar quite quickly  and less alarming. The waiting room is usually very busy but it should be a friendly and calm place when you get a bit more used to it. 

II think we have been very fortunate but he discussed side effects with the team and they medicate to help manage how he feels. 

His treatment. may be different from  the ones that your Dad is given.but hopefully it will help to see at least one way that the treatment is administered? 

It is so hard to get used to but somehow you do! Wishing you and your family the very best! Xx

Thank you for all of that information. My dad goes for chemo every 3 weeks and had radio everyday for a 3 week stint, but we don't know what it will look like after this first treatment is complete in April. As it stands he couldn't drive himself at the moment as he's too tired, I don't know if that will improve or if they can do anything about that really. I love that you call the pump bob! I guess we will see what this next phase brings, it's so different for everyone but one thing is for sure, it's life changing for everyone too. Take care of yourself x

Thank you. I agree with you Xx My husband reminded me that his chemo iss a general generic one as there are cancers in a number of places so the stronger and more targeted ones are not suitable. Which is why he's able to take him self for treatment up to now. 

He's moving to a different one tomorrow as the first one isn't working to stop new ones aany more. So who knows how that will go!?

Thank you and take care of yourself! Xxx

Ahh I understand,  I don't know what dad's plan will be after this but speaking to his cancer nurse now which is really helping. I hope they can keep it at bay for you both. I'm still stressing about the wedding and so many what ifs. Head might fall off soon :) Keeping my thoughts with you, it helps to know people in similar situations x