Anxiety and a need to be heard

Hi Bbeca2020 

A warm welcome to our community, I hope you find it supportive and helpful.

I have on the odd occasion had a passing remark such as "this is the last time we will do this" but not on a scale like you describe. 

With us perhaps things were the other way around in that I was putting a lot of thought in to how I would cope after Janice had gone, especially as we had a young son and I was easily able to imaging things a lot worse that actually happened. I ended up doing a living with less stress course that really helped me. We often talk on here on living day to day and partially that was a major help since by focusing on each day I found I could enjoy the good days and then there seemed to be more good days. The breathing exercises were great too for helping when life decided to throw us a curve ball but also in helping me relax and get some sleep.

Posting on here can be helpful but if you find it might be helpful you are also welcome to ring the helpline 

<<hugs>>

Steve

Hi there ! 
I knew it would be hard but the reality is very different to what I expected. You are not alone xxxx

my husband was diagnosed back in October with stage 3 bowel cancer but due to various situations including surgery on an abscess just before Xmas his treatment only began last week.  He’s now having radiotherapy and chemo (capecitabine) 5 days a week for 5 weeks .  In that time if I say Im tired he responds with well how do you think Im feeling! Dismissing me and this makes me feel awful as though I’m being selfish. 
I’ve arranged for other people to take him to his appointments sì I can still to my 2 5 hours shifts of work. But last night he was complaining/just saying that he would rather I take him to every appointment!! 
Like you Im starting to feel frustrated and resentful because I am trying to look after myself too so that I am there for him. 
I try to remember that he’s scared and also the drugs do affect their personality so it’s not his fault. But it is hard when you are the closest 

deep breaths - make sure you get some you time - and I’ve found this forum is invaluable especially for saying what’s really on your mind. Without judgment from anyone. Which helps actually process some of your thoughts

reach out anytime us partners are suffering just as much xxx 

Bella

Hi this is the first time I have ever posted or done anything like this only joined today reading your post I can relate to my wife was diagnosed with 3 hlrcc 2 years ago  this is a none curible hereditary cancer my yougest daughter  has the gene and is being monitered

My wife is on imunoptherpy  and doing really well but this has changed  her persnality also she is scared it seems  nothing I say or do is right

Hi Dee28

It’s inevitable that our partners are scared and I’ve started to notice that the irritability is directly related to the pain & discomfort he has. Although he tries to hide the intensity of the pain from me. 
But I’m still treading on eggshells not always knowing what version of my hubby I’m getting. 
Its good to know it’s not unusual so makes it more bearable knowing Im not alone.

thank you for sharing & make sure you get some ‘you’ time