Incurable but…?

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Hi there

my hubby has only recently been diagnosed with cancer that we’ve been told has already spread to a distant location so know it isn’t curable but we’ve not been told the prognosis.  A treatment plan is underway but I feel nervous about finding out what the outlook is. Google is not helping as it seems to paint a bleak picture and I know any prognosis is only an estimate with a multitude of variables at play.  However I’m not sure I want to know.  Somehow by putting a time period on it it could feel like that is so finite and would affect his mindset knowing his time is limited.  Does anyone else feel like that?  Not sure I’m explaining this well either.  It is all so overwhelming 

  • Hi Ama H, and a warm welcome to the forum, though I'm so sorry to hear about your husband. I too am treatable, but not curable, 30 months now. 

    Please don't Google for information, they catastrophise everything leading you to the worst outcomes, if you need to find information, use trusted sites like Macmillan, CRUK or the NHS websites.

    My feelings, and most of the people I know with a non curable diagnosis, take no notice of a prognosis as they are based on old studies,  treatments and guesswork, It's not a good way to get on with living with an inaccurate countdown clock ticking away in your head.

    I am on the Living with incurable cancer forum, where many are years past their "prognosis", we even have 2 members who have been cured, today's medicines and therapies are so much better than just a few years ago, with new ways of treating cancer becoming available all the time, best wishes to you both.

    Eddie xx