I am an only child and both my parents are dealing with cancer currently. My mum hopefully starts Chemo in a few days time for ovarian cancer but is already so tired, mentally and physically that I am so worried for her as chemo needs you at full strength right? She’s become quite breathless, even just walking up the stairs and has been told she has developed some fluid on her lungs. Does this need to be cleared before the chemotherapy starts? Its taken so long to get a date for this chemo I couldn’t bare if it got delayed again but I just don’t know what to do.
My dad has skin cancer that has broken out and is & looks like extremely sore.(like a bright red golf ball that weeps) I feel so frustrated with the care he’s received for it so far as it is just meeting after meeting with surgeons, nurses, oncology team but it’s been months now and no action has been taken. He was due to have a surgery to have it cut out, only to have that canceled the day before the surgery and told it could be treated with immunotherapy and now we’re no clearer on that treatment plan and the lump is still there causing pain and discomfort. In the meantime he’s now been told there’s been further signs of cancer at the base of his brain that have shown up in an MRI. Is this spread from what hasn’t been acted upon or new? All the same why isn’t any actual action happening. It’s been months now!
I am really Struggling with this situation and just feel constant anxiety currently, not sleeping and effecting my work.
Hi Salix
Welcome to our community I hope you find joining our band helpful.
It does sound a really difficult position dealing with both parents at the same time, that does sound extra difficult.
For your mum the team will be checking she it ok before they give the chemo though perhaps it is not to uncommon not to be at full strength. One thing it can be useful to monitor quite closely is temperature. we used an ear thermometer like the one in the hospital and Janice had a couple of spells in hospital for antibiotics when she was being treated.
For your dad, if you do not know what is happening it may be worth chasing up.
Then for you - not all all surprised a how you are feeling and well done for coming here. I certainly got the point I was pretty much broken before I looked for help. I have done a living with less stress course that really helped me, worrying about the future I could not control and was able to imagine much worse than actually happened stopped my enjoying what we had. That not sleeping bit can rapidly make us ill and it can be worth a chat with your GP about you. It might be worth looking at taking a break from work and your GP may help you with that. I hope your work is supportive too, anyone can become a carer at any time and how employers react at a time like this can really reflect on their care too.
<<hugs>>
Steve
