Carer loneliness

Hi Peugeot_12 welcome to the forum. It's sad reading your post as Carers too often are the casualties of Cancer and other illnesses and just expected to pick up the pieces and soldier on. However you are not alone and need not be. If you felt able to you could make contact with the Macmillan Line who could put you in touch with services to support both of you. 08088080000. The other thing that might be helpful is to get in touch with ant Carers organisations nearby where you live as they can support you and will. I'm wondering if it's worth calling the Gp in and asking for a home visit where he could maybe have a chat with hubby and see how you are coping as they can ask nurses to call or other professionals who may be of help. It is never too early to ask for support so please do pick up the phone and make some contacts that will offer support for you. Best wishes and please do keep in touch and let us know how you get on..xxx

Thank you so much for replying to me. It means a lot. We do have a MacMillan centre I just felt that I should be grateful I’ve not got cancer. And it’s not about me. It’s about the person who has cancer. But I will contact them and try my gp because my husband does need someone to talk too. Someone that can reassure him. It’s such a big responsibility for me. Dealing with the seizures is the worst. But knowing I. Have now got someone like you and I appreciate your help. I’ll let you know how I go on. 

Diane

Hi Peugeot_12 so glad to have been of help and to reassure you that we are here for you as well as the person with Cancer as are Macmillan. I look for ward to hearing how you get on and hope that services get mobilised to help you both.xxx

Hi Peugeot12,

I would definitely ring MacMillan for help and support for the both of you, I think it would be a great help going forwards, even if it’s just to talk to someone else about you’re both feeling.

It might also help to have your GP come in and assess your husband and he might have to go on anti depression medication as he’s probably struggling with all of this too.

My heart goes out to you as being a carer full time is hard work as I was the carer for my wife until she got taken into the hospice yesterday, as she now needs proper stage 4 cancer treatment, it was so hard to admit that I could no longer look after her, but I do know that she’s in the best place now until she gives in as she’s incredibly weak.

Please do get some extra help and support and please try to get some rest when and if possible x

Andy

Thank you so much for replying to me. I am going to contact MacMillan as I have found a contact in my hometown. I also contacted our GP surgery yesterday and they are going to send somebody out to assess him. Not heard anything back from them yet. I am so sorry that your wife has had to go into a hospice. I agree she is in the right place, you  as a carer and a husband will have gone above and beyond to care for her and I hope you know that. It is hard work and I hope you have a good support network around you at this awful time. Thanks for taking the time to help me. I appreciate it.
I’ll let you know how I go on. 
I’m sending you a big hug. You must be heartbroken. I wish you well and take care xxx

Hi Peugeot12,

Thank you so much for your kind words and hug  

It is a lonely place being a carer, but there is so much help out there, I have been referred for counselling at the hospice and will in the near future use the services after my wife sadly passes.

Luckily my wife and I have so many fantastic friends and family, we are both being supported so much, wether it’s someone being up the hospice with my wife while I have a few hours rest (which is important) or walking my dogs round the block.

Please do let me know how you get on, I hope you do find the help you need, so both you and your husband can be in a better place.

Andy